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I never made that connection before but you're absolutely right! The whole "just take a shower, comb your hair and dress nicely" dating advice is exactly like the "just walk up to the owner of the company and give him a firm handshake and you'll get the job!" career advice. It's coming from a place of good intentions, but from a reality that no longer exists.

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Tbh a lot of men I've interacted that held borderline incel opinions could have used a shower and a fashion make-over. It woudn't get them the dream gf but it would have been a start from where to develop

Most incel opinions I've met are from men who are well educated, financially successful, socially fluent, dress decently, and exercise. The reason they have incel opinions is because they've done everything society told them that should attract women but they're still not getting anything.

It's no wonder most single men in FAANG are incels (only ones I found to not be single usually met their spouse in college or got arranged marriages). They're all ivy league educated, work hard, and do a lot of crazy shit for hobbies but ultimately look like a nerd and that's an incredibly oversaturated market.

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