Your first point is the only one that stands for non-straight porn.

2 and 3 don’t apply to gay porn for obvious reasons.

Point 4 probably has more to do with your proximity to sex workers than anything. I have plenty of friends that make their own amateur porn, to me there’s nothing wrong with it. Also, living in sf, I’ve also met plenty of professional gay performers. They’re just like you and I, but they have a more interesting line of work.

My point is not to say that the effects of porn are all positive, but that your issue with porn might have more to do with the way society treats women and sexuality than it does with porn itself.