> ... asdf as it seems to break existing tool management in creative ways
Do note that asdf re-uses existing tooling, so trying to combine ruby-build and node version manager and asdf with node and ruby plug-ins is likely to crash and burn (because you end up forcing existing tooling to fight with itself).
Not sure if this was what caused your problems - but my asdf-life got a lot more pleasant when just asdf all the things (that I use).
Does mean that things like vs code needs the right environment / local tool versions and language servers to work with your projects and vs code plug-ins.