> She feels kind of resentful toward feminism telling her she didn't need children to be happy.

Not everybody has the same needs or desires, and feminism defends that women can be different from one another and not just making babes machines.

Your friend seems so confused about feminism as about how difficult is to have children after 40. As you say in another comment.

I do not know from where are you but it seems that better education could help your friend in many ways.