extfs isn't a thing, and I say that because ext3 or 4 or even 2, matters here.

That spake, I wonder, are your bad experiences here with VMs, or with a raspberry pi?

Pis, especially the 2, had faulty hardware, and would report a successful write to an sd card before it was done. To "help" with speed.

This cause the sort of issues you are mentioning. And similarly, any situation where a write complete is a lie, can result in this behaviour too.

EG, a raid card with hard power off, no battery backed up cache, etc.

Because your experiences do not jive here, with ext4, and thousands upon thousands of servers and desktops I maintain.