I totally empathize. I waffled on Tailscale for a long time, and was convinced I'd roll my own for everything.

But goddamn if that spiffy web interface is not just the bees knees. I relented and put in a Google account that I don't use very often for identity--no idea if that makes it more or less like to be arbitrarily banned by Google--and accepted the fact that access to Tailscale wasn't so critical for me that I needed to be worried about it.

But in production, I totally get it. But I'd probably still just pay for Tailscale's SAML and use Okta or something...