This has gotta be some sort of HN meme at this point but... NixOS gives you this (with the tradeoff of course of a really steep learning curve and very opinionated packaging structure)!
Tbh in the hypothetical scenario where all of a company's configuration were handled via nix, you'd be staring at tens to hundreds of thousands of lines of company-custom .nix files where one single line might cause the bug you are encountering.
Right, but at least anyone could look into it in the company repo, instead of needing to poke at the actual machine (or an image of it)
The asymptote for NixOS approaches -infinity.
Once it actually is usable, sure, I'll take a look.