Humans have devised many, many institutions and philosophies for helping each other grow into powerful moral people. Uncountable religions, self help movements, mind-body wellness systems, the list goes on and on.

Every single one, without exception, has examples of people at the top of the institution, widely regarded as masters of the system, who are miserable destructive human beings.

This makes me profoundly sad. I could understand if every single group of people had members who are toxic, but the fact that the selection systems for progression are so predictably bad...

IME, the best you can do is to find a small local scene that practices the system in a way that is healthy and nurturing for the members and live with the cognitive dissonance caused by the rot at the top. Whether it's your small neighborhood church, a martial arts dojo or your toastmasters club, these things can be great in the small even if they're awful in the large.