But... you have all this money. Hire an adult? Almost anyone who's had a trading desk job would tell you to clean up. You don't need to have much experience to do this part, just get one of your friends that you must know from the business?
Also, WTF would this say about Ontario Teachers' Pension Fund or Sequioa if the whole team was on drugs, playing games all day, and having no idea what their balance sheet looks like? I actually got Ontario into a fund I was at, and we'd have lost the investment if we hadn't behaved like adults. This is causing me some cognitive dissonance, because I don't think of the investors as the kind of people who'd even smile if they found me in the office playing a video game, let alone addled on drugs.
Also about the market making strats not working anymore, I don't see why they'd even need it. Once the exchange is jump started and you have WM/Jump/JS on board, there's MMs on the platform and it feeds itself. Just keep marketing running. Hand out some FTT or something to retail. Do silly advertisements. Just turn off the algo that doesn't work.