The basic reason this happens is fear, which is natural. Fear that by revealing a weakness, something bad can happen, or we may need to change in a way we are not sure is possible, both of which may or may not be the case. However, you should not fear discovering a weakness in yourself, because that is now something that you can learn from. You can learn how to live with it, or improve upon it. If you discover a problem, or someone else discovers one, that is a good thing, it is something that you can work on fixing, even fix it together.

Don’t lie to yourself, even if you think you need to lie to others to avoid something bad. Avoid lying to others: it can erode trust, make it difficult to openly be yourself, and you may accidentally lie to yourself in the process.

So what to do? You can start by trying to never lie to yourself, with the knowledge that it will only hold you back. Try to accept things for how they are, and how they may play out. Notice that we are not perfect, but at least we can improve and find ways to mitigate our weaknesses (and each others). Don’t dwell on the past, thinking you’re no good, that’s not healthy either.

It’s okay to be who you are, with your strengths, weaknesses, set backs, problems, desires, irritations, blessings, mistakes, failures and successes. If we live in balance with them, we will find our way to get through life. Understanding is key to finding balance. Honest, quality communication helps to achieve understanding, and ultimately balance with ourselves, each other, and the natural world.