Ask HN: How to Go Back Home | Hacker News Reader

Ask HN: How to Go Back Home

6 pointsdrifter_8 comments

Working in tech industry, been 10 years. Ended up in tech by accident, supposed to be a teacher. Started coding one summer in college, rest is history.

Big city, good company, good position, good salary. Though there is one thing: don't want to be here. Not unhappiness, just lack of happiness, just apathy.

Want to go back to my country, return to my hometown, return home. This is not new, been feeling like this for the last 3 years.

Don't want to work remotely, don't want to work in tech at all. Want to go back to teaching.

Two problems: 1 - How to stop feeling like a disappointment? 2 - How to justify a 95% income drop from my current job to a average teacher salary in my 3rd world country?

Any advice much appreciated. Cheers.

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I actually know more than one person who did this or their parents did this. The made it work because they all basically retired early (e.g. late 40s, early 50s) using the strength of their US/European currency versus the currency in their home country. Basically, they spent 15-20 years working and then went back and became teachers. None of them moved to the relatively HCOL areas in their home countries though - more to 2nd or 3rd tier cities or more rural areas.

First thing they did was purchase a home, car, furniture, and that took care of the typical monthly expenses that eat into your salary. The rest went into CDs or other fixed income accounts. If you combine that with a teacher's salary, it's more than enough to live a basic and comfortable life.

I think the only caveat here is currency value fluctuation. The laws and rules about how you keep your money in accounts (e.g. American Dollar versus local currency) can vary a lot and change over time. The weakening of a currency can basically force you to change your plans. Some people have to "unretire" after a while.

None of the people I'm thinking about were "rich" by Western standards when when they lived in US/Europe. So it's not a story of some startup millionaires who went back and lived a life of luxury.

I have a few friends who did that!! I am still trying to see if I can make conservation photography as my primary job (which obviously pays zilch). Kudos for even thinking about this. I come from a small town and I credit my entire life trajectory to my school teachers. They were simply awesome and so under-appreciated.

While I am tempted to write a long essay, I will call out 4 points which I think are crucial:

1. Talk to someone you trust who can be a bit more objective (and a good listener). You will find the answers yourself.

2. You are going to die someday. Think about what you want to leave behind.

3. Assuming you have some money saved and where you are going to live, your drop in quality of life might not be as high as you anticipate.

4. It is easier if you are not married. Getting back into tech industry is both easier and harder than you would expect.

My go-to books for these kind of questions have been [1] Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam (https://www.gutenberg.org/files/22535/22535-h/22535-h.htm) [2] Stray Birds by Tagore (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/6524)

Please dm me if you just want to talk about it and best of luck.

>It is easier if you are not married.

I realize that every decision is easier in theory when only one person has to make a decision, but sometimes having a spouse and kids can make things easier.

Most of the people I know who went back home because a)their spouses also wanted to migrate back home and b)both of them weren't comfortable with their kids going to Middle/High school in their "Western" country. Your spouse supporting your decision can make that easier. So if your goal is ultimately to go back, pick a spouse that supports that.

The point here is not some much as moving back as it is in loss of income (and potentially status/face). That is a much harder sell than saying we will move back for a better life.

I recently (last 6 months) went into tech away from my home town. (not too far; US town to different US town)

I’ve found life to be good here, but I can’t help but think I had it made in my home town: in terms of family (father recently got out of rehab, and despite his issues, I love him), Great long time friends, along with some love interests (left one behind that I felt like I really clicked with!). I don’t know, it felt like life was getting good for me for the first time in a long time, and then I left to go for the job offer I accepted out of school.

I certainly wouldn’t call myself depressed here, I’m active, see friends nearly every day. The town is really nice too. At the same time, I don’t feel the overwhelming sense of appreciation that I used to.

There are some good work opportunities there as well, although I’m not sure if the pay would be quite as good. I try to keep in touch with my friends from town but its already getting hard. I’m afraid that if I wait too long I wouldn’t have much to come back to. Simultaneously I don’t want to waste the time I’m investing in my new home.

Any thoughts hackers?

It sounds like you’re just a bit burnt out. Maybe try a sabbatical first before making any big moves.

If that doesn’t work, seriously consider switching to a part-time remote job. I don’t know what your current salary is or where you’re from, but I’m assuming that even 5-10 hours a week of remote software work will be significantly higher than a local teacher salary. I wouldn’t throw that opportunity away on a whim, especially if you have any family members to consider.

Hi Drifter, I am a coach working with engineers and programmers

I feel you pain of not feeling worth while, you say, you wanted to be a teacher.

would you like to have 30 mins call to see what really bothers you?

the call is free and its not to sell you any service

my email is in my profile

Daniel

Do a trial. Or do it step by step.

Spend few (2-3) months in your native town, work remotely at your current job. See how it feels.

Soon you'll be able to justify eitherway if making the full transition is worth it or not.

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