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https://github.com/jeffknupp/sandman2 works with many different backends including sqlite, but postgrest definitely have the auth flow and security model right for these things.

Anything compiled and not Python like Go, Rust etc.?

https://pocketbase.io/

Seems very promising!

Seems most promising but the reply was to postgrest, because I really don't need a UI

Founder of noco here.

We do support SQLite as well and it comes with litestream baked in within our docker.

https://github.com/mevdschee/php-crud-api does not have the features you need?

Postgrest has excellent security setup, which is tightly integrated into postgres, I mean there are, by obvious design, no real paradigms for SQLite

Here it is =) https://github.com/wundergraph/wunderbase

No, still not there, but perhaps running in conjunction with that wundergraph API gateway will get me most of the way

But I also like the simplicity of just REST and feel like the postgrest people have figured that out

Nocodb seems to create REST API endpoints for SQLite. Might be worth checking this project out.