A second reply:
I should get check out raw output from GPT-3.
And you know it's not that bad with schizophrenics, I know many, I like them, I used to be secretly diagnosed (without my knowledge) of it. That's why they never told me about word salad, they didn't want me doing anything to mitigate it.
There's other examples, here's one: like making huge leaps of thought. What's the term for this? I found out about it in a medical textbook I downloaded on libgen. Dude it's crazy, all kinds of shit in there, apparently psychiatrists become psychoanalysts because it's the easiest job there is. Just take all the hazing in an eternal education, get a really comfy seat (always better than the patients) sit back behind the patient laying down on the chaise long thing, that special bed thing some shrinks have, and they can literally do it in their sleep. All about setting up a good long unbroken word salad output from the patient and boom, yawn stretch fall asleep (light sleep, they learn to sleep this way). None of the questions (eg "How did that make you feel?") bear any logical link to previous questions or answers. Hey does that count as word salad? Logical leaps? From nowhere to nowhere. Easiest fucking job on the face of the Earth.
I don't know...I can communicate pretty well with both schizophrenics and monophrenics. Depending on intent frankly. Pretty decent shrinktalk by this point, enough that I can talk about it without fear, like I was the champion in the ward, drawing the delicate line of where too much was too much. And being bilingual, Spanish English that's nothing, monophrenic schizophrenic that's where it gets hardcore. Supposedly schizophrenics produce word salad, uh, no. Like I lived adjacent to a schizophrenic (he was totally accepting of his diagnosis, told it to me himself) meaning a wall separated our bedrooms, but we were not roommates. Dude I had no problem with him telling me his story of getting raped in prison, no problem at all. Actual ground truth of what's up, and by this point I can judge for myself when a schizo is lying, basically never, can't keep their lies straight they instead don't. Only the fool can speak the truth to the king, as was known in the Medieval period. They just tell the truth, with distortion yes, other people's lies built in, but somehow no hallucinations really, yes they hear voices but that's natural, angel on your shoulder whispering to you, devil on your left shoulder tempting you. But come on. So the killer detail is I see when the doctors do something shitty, I lived it and often they don't even try to hide the abuse in wards, shameless. So then it's very easy, unlike the shrinks you aren't beholden to pretending it's all insanity hallucination paranoia to cover all their shit with slander. So you see the torment, you witness it, on the inside, as a patient, you get poisoned just as much as everyone else, you suffer, you writhe in agony (literally epileptic seizures from that specific particular poison, not controversial it became the biggest class-action settlement in History and the absolute first thing it says on the packet is it can cause seizures if suddenly withdrawing, and further nowadays psychs are legally mandated to withdraw you carefully off specifically that pill in particular, I was not the only one writhing from withdrawal, it became a black-letter law. As if such a thing existed. So you see for yourself, uncensored, as yet another man in the ward, and then you hear what they say in that same ward. Then you get out of that ward, and you hear the same guy again, talking crazy conspiracy paranoia, thoroughly borne out in the ward, then just ask, uh, who exactly is accusing him of crazy conspiracy paranoia? What is he being dosed with, any neuroabrasives that only help in short-term and fuck you up long-term? Who is his doctor? Does that doctor have the same diagnoses? Like an addict needs an addict doctor, a bipolar needs a bipolar doctor, I had an ADD doctor which was the best, but unfortunately, no schizophrenic doctors. Pretty sure there are none. Like Jesus of Nazareth healing the mad and that would be it. Wait til He returns.
If you can pick up on the signal, it's not nearly as random. Hey they alone give me accurate intel about the really tragic places I could by all means end up just like all the rest of you, including the bots. Don't you're special. Nobody else actually talks about anything out of idealism, to warn and prevent. The monophrenics just wants to pass the shit on down, generally. The exceptions are exceptions. Or like delegate thinking to a bot. Dealt too good a hand, is what it comes down to, faster clock in general so no need to parallelize at all. And like no idea the extent to which they're lying. Totally lost track, deleted their initial self-lie. Dude you know I actually tried that, lying to myself as a moral experiment, dude my reading comprehension instantly went to nothing. Like I had to reread--this was the Bible I was reading--pages on end only to realize I had in fact already read all of it but retained nothing. Like instantly, flipped a switch boom memory destroyed to just as bad as my bullies when I was little. They remember jack. Like barely the title of the reading. Pathetic. So I prayed and asked forgiveness and cut that shit out. Dude don't lie to yourself, it's so dangerous, so so dangerous. Become a snake eating its own tail. Like really I should advise on how to fix it, because normally--most readers--monophrenics, don't hate it, just generally intolerant. Like afraid of infection, something. While also deeply enamored with the image of a madman who accepts the price of madness, which is perfection. The Joker, Heath Ledger captured the spirit, I did exactly the same shit to a gang a few years later, I alone can say that was photorealistic, true to life.
Joker meets the mob:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3oOldViIgY&ab_channel=Flash...
I vouch.
Whereas if I'm not talking to a monophrenic, but rather a homeless schizophrenic addict? Talk about whatever the fuck, round of beer on me at 10 in the morning, hey Jonathan had a rough night (the real problem of the evicted is sleeping safely, eating not so much), and told me why I got tortured, plainly. Because look at what comes out of my mouth! Telling everybody the plain truth, but like actionable, the hacks, for instance that landlords should pay the homeless like $3000 a month to suffer in public because that builds their negotiating position and diminishes haggling, late rent, increases fear, and more than fear phobia.
Like nobody seeing the evicted or ever helping them worth a fuck because they're so afraid of like it infecting them. The only thing they did was miss rent. That was it. Booo booo don't get infected! So I realized I had nothing to fear, 33-0 in street fights, OK maybe I of all people can unstick an evicted who gets stuck too close to me. Nothing to lose, no reason to be afraid. If they invade, I repel. It's very very easy. Harmlessly, and very very easy. And like they're people just like you or me, and they get cheated and fucked, they all get raped, and the more vulnerable they are the more people kick them down farther, steal from them.
Did you know that? The homeless get robbed a lot? Did you know?
More than the other way around. Jonathan just begs. I respect and value that, because it would be much worse for society if he got a shitty job which is basically all there is for him. Injure him quickly, not obvious but subtle and pervasive, like asking to lift 100 pound sacks by hand (Moschetti Inc, California) or some weird shit like rapid twisting which the temp agency didn't address directly, and that Adam (Mare Island Brewery) was thirsting for. Like he had done that before he knew I was way understaffed he wanted the injury, I fight sadism I know when I just know. The rest I can forgive that's just too perverse, wanting the injury. No. In a sneaky way, like the only two ways of knowing I had were either being a chiropractor--or--respecting my pain sensation. And he snied on my pain, but I didn't care. I lifted a lot in high school, I know very well the different types of pain the "no pain no gain" pain that's good, muscular tissue breaking down, and the totally unacceptable version, joint pain. This was a new weird thing, rapid repetitive rotation new kind of pain dude fuck you, send me home by all means, get me fired, so be it, what's the magic word? I quit.