Yes a lot of crash diets fail, for obvious reasons, but once a diet has stabilized the cravings will go away.
It does for many people mean they will need to cut out or dramatically cut down the eating out, drinking and instant meals. Most people don't want to do that.
If we agree on this, then your argument isn't that people are destined to obesity, but rather that once they're obese, they have patterns of behavior that are extremely hard to break over a long term basis. That isn't the same as saying that weight loss is a futile endeavor, it's just saying that people who are obese are very often going to fail to stick to the patterns of behavior that resulted in weight loss.
It is not hard for the body to discourage unnecessary caloric expenditure in response to a notable caloric deficit. Indeed, doing just that is a basic famine survival instinct.
Now given the decidedly non-famine conditions, eventually things should restablize, but it does mean for a person at caloric equilibrium, reducing caloric intake by say 500 Calories, will often not result in a 500 calorie deficit, but a smaller one for for quite some time until the body adjusts to this being the new normal.
In the mean time, the person likely feels like shit. Furthermore, If there actually is food available, the body and subconscious mind is doing everything it can to encourage the person to eat more.
This substantial resistance of the body to attempts to run meaningful caloric deficits for an extended period are a not insignificant portion of why "dieting" often fails. People don't stick with it, since it majorly sucks.
Appetite changes likely play a more important role than slowing metabolism in explaining the weight loss plateau since the feedback circuit controlling long-term calorie intake has greater overall strength than the feedback circuit controlling calorie expenditure. Specifically, it has been estimated that for each kilogram of lost weight, calorie expenditure decreases by about 20–30 kcal/d whereas appetite increases by about 100 kcal/d above the baseline level prior to weight loss31. Despite these predictable physiologic phenomena, the typical response of the patient is to blame themselves as lazy or lacking in willpower, sentiments that are often reinforced by healthcare providers, as in the example of Robert, above.
And what if they don't eat that much? They die or what?