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Comment by tokai | Hacker News Reader

>I have the feeling that I am not truly a man because a man has no time to watch children movies

Paradoxically that's a very childish thought.

“Critics who treat ‘adult’ as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.”

—C.S. Lewis

Sounds like rationalization of his own passion for content aimed at children. As a writer and intellectual he certainly could shot back with heavy bullets at those who questioned his own mental maturity. But the question remains.

The majority of popular films have content both children and adults can enjoy. Mass market appeal is where the money is.

If the child-like moments of the show are sticking out to you, okay, maybe try to find the bigger picture in the story.

Complaining that you have to conform to what some girls find attractive (or what other guys say girls find attractive), is no criticism of the film.

If you want to otaku/weeb out on some niche anime, go find some uwu girl who likes that stuff.

I don't understand this view that every woman has to like everything you're into and be attracted to it. You're going to get into some stuff that fluxuates your 'attractivity' metric and it's just part of your life.

Pulling apart a motorcycle engine and spreading broken parts across the front lawn isn't so flash, but by golly, gee-willikers, it's going to happen if I want it to.

Well, I'm not the only one thinking this way. Your attractivity will go below zero if you mention that you like some anime movie. Any sucess will never be because of it but despite of it.

Cite your sources.

I disagree with the parent comment for other reasons, but I would grant him that saying "I like anime" is seen (injustly, IMHO) as a turn-off.

I quickly looked in Google Scholar and found this paper titled "Pale and Geeky: Prevailing Stereotypes of Anime Fans", and I quote:

> The social distance items suggest that anime fans are indeed stigmatized. For example, non-fans indicated a willingness to interact with anime fans at a distance (e.g., neighbor, coworker), but did not wish for an anime fan to hold political power (e.g., governor) or be allowed into one’s personal life (e.g., relationship partner, roommate).

[1] https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Stephen-Reysen/publicat...

Anime has entered the mainstream for a while now, idk what you're talking about. You see the number of NBA stars saying they love anime? There's a video just a few days ago of wiggs talking about demon slayer, a ton of players love Naruto, etc. Don't act like a dweeb and anime isn't the turn off it once was.

Appreciated, but this is the first sentence in your citation:

> We examined the content of anime fan stereotypes in a sample of non-fans (N = 146). Self-identified non-fans of anime wrote about a prototypical anime fan and rated the prototype’s personality their desired social distance from the prototype.

I think we can both see where conclusions drawn here might fail. Replace any human characteristic and have non-fans of that characteristic respond, and you’re likely to get similar results.

I think that’s more the statement ‘I like anime’ without context?

If you already see the person in front of you is not a pasty white nerd the statement doesn’t make as much of sn impression.

In which case the problem is really being a pasty white nerd.

I've only skimmed some the paper, but does it distinguish between _types_ of anime fans?

I think the people the non-fans are probably thinking of are more likely "weeaboos", or people who are so obsessed with Japanese culture that they completely reject their own (the ones in really cringey videos). However, there are so many more people now that are either more open to the medium or just openly enjoy it but aren't really as visible - I'd love to see a reproduction of this test with this distinguishing factor.

I like to rewatch the Ghibli movies with my wife from time to time.

Ask her what she thinks when she sees the reflection of an anime on your eyes and demand an honest answer.

...are you for real?!

He’s trolling and/or role-playing an extremely sexually insecure character.

People have really weird hobbies.

You're right that you're not the only one - this way of thinking is common, it's known as "fragile masculinity". As you've found, if you worry too much about people with very fragile masculinity, you won't be able to enjoy things you want to enjoy. I think it makes sense to just not worry about these people.

"a man" isn't defined by their 'attractivity' -- an entirely subjective thing.

as for what does make a man, go ask Socrates.

If a particular lady doesn't like you because you enjoy a Ghibli movie, there's a good chance you're not long term compatible.

> Any sucess will never be because of it but despite of it.

Success is what - pulling? ... Or finding a partner who likes you for who you are?

Anyway, liking the things you like, regardless of others opinion, is an attractive trait (as long as you're not harming people).

Similarly, being deceptive is very unattractive; and more importantly, deeply bad for you.

>Similarly, being deceptive is very unattractive; and more importantly, deeply bad for you.

On the contrary. The ability to be deceptive, to wear more than one mask, is an evolutionary advantage in my opinion and highly attractive even if people will never admit it because it's socially unacceptable.

Pfft. A five year old can be deceptive. A dog can be deceptive. Deception is easy, and often the easy way out. Being honest is hard - but it's worth it.

You only get one life. If you spend it lying to everyone, you'll end up not even learning who you are.

People with the built-in social surveillance software called "conscience" have a hard time to be deceptive without feeling bad about themselves. For most people it's way easier to be honest.

Not being deceptive is also an evolutionary advantage because people can trust you and you earn a position of respect in your group. Evolutionary psychology is popsci trash, you can invent just-so stories for any number of claims using it.

> Your attractivity will go below zero if you mention that you like some anime movie.

Watch the movie together first, then mention you like it after. Your attractivity will go through the roof.

Anime is a very broad genre, aiming at small kids, teenager to young adults; and since some decades more and more also older adults. Ghibli for example is more family-orientated than just children. So it highly depends on which anime you enjoy and for what reasons, and what you make of it. Comparable here are Harry Potter-, Marvel- or Star Wars-Movies. Nobody would say liking these makes you unattractive, but most people would also not say it makes you attractive (fans of those franchises/genre are the obvious exception).

The actual thing is, you probably got it the wrong way. Not anime makes you unattractive, the lack of anything attractive makes you unattractive.

I've watched all of these over and over with my wife.

I would never be in a relationship with a man who couldn't find time to enjoy these films with me or couldn't find something to love in them. Neither would any of my current or past partners or close friends, I don't think.

These aren't anime bullshit with misogynistic crap, complicated giant robot plot-mechanisms that nobody can bother to follow, pedophilic male gaze crap, untranslatable humor, or the other things that plague a lot of Japanese comics and animation, they're quite accessible pieces of relatively pure art. The worst thing they have going for them is a mild obsession with themes of aviation, and some somewhat preachy subtextual political views (nature and harmony and people good, industry and violence and authority bad, mkay).

If you can't bring yourself to appreciate the art in them even a little, I would frankly question your emotional intelligence.

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