Ah for me the lack of sense of what’s going on is sort of the point of it. The rotated projections are just as right as the regular Mercator projection in an objective way, but it really doesn’t feel that way.
This is the best I could do, and it's pretty much just putting the vast empty expanses of the Pacific and Atlantic oceans in the higher-distortion areas near the top and bottom.
Except Lambert and Albers.
They become conical.
Only if you drop the objective reason (navigation) that the Mercator projection was made.