For me, this is key. The early years were hard on me. I’m a hobby-driven introvert, and having kids felt like a major sacrifice of the personal time I was used to. I learned a lot about myself and my needs in the process.
I loved my kids more than anything, but I also teetered on regret for some time. I’d see other dads seem to revel in parenthood and be unequivocally joyful in their decision, and I’d feel ashamed. I feared I wasn’t cut out to be a parent.
Now my kids are 5 and 8, and it’s completely different. Parenting has become much more fun and fulfilling. I look forward to weekends with my kids, chatting with them, encouraging their interests, taking family vacations, family movie nights, and so on. They still drive us nuts on a regular basis, but it's a joyful life, and it’s night and day from the toddler years.
Hopefully you’ll have a smile on your face all the way through! But to the extent you don’t, remember that it’s always changing. Some stages change in weeks or months, others take years. Hang in there, do the best you can, and take it a day at a time.
Also: Be honest with yourself and your partner about your needs. I always was reluctant to ask for alone time because my wife is an extrovert. But I needed it to be a decent human. My wife and I both learned this the hard way. ;)
Congratulations! This is the biggest and most important adventure you can take. <3