Writing does lock the database (or at least the shard), but if the page is in RAM, that means you're locked for the duration of a write to memory, which is inconsequential. The problem comes when you try to write to a page that's not resident. In that case, you can end up (worst case) having to write a dirty page to disk to free up a slot, load the page you
want to write, and then write it.
This can be really time-consuming, so one "fix" is to retrieve a document before writing it (thus guaranteeing it will be resident in RAM). More recent versions of MongoDB (2.0 on IIRC) also try to yield the write lock before faulting on write to avoid this problem (though it doesn't work 100% of the time).
Oh, and one other thing to be aware of is that anything that uses the Javascript engine in MongoDB is going to use the spidermonkey global interpreter lock, so you probably want to avoid those things if performance is a concern ($where, .group(), .mapreduce(), etc.)