Hacker News Reader

Comment by rsyring | Hacker News Reader

Age. I turned 40 and realized I probably wasn't on the upswing of life anymore. I've developed a small but weighty sense of "time is running out" that I didn't have before. I want that to be a motivator to do good and meaningful things and not a growing sense of foreboding. That necessitates contemplation of life, faith, priorities, etc.

View on HN

Well my friend, you are describing what Stoic Philosophers call “momento mori.” Always remember death is coming and enjoy every moment as it passes.

You just turned 40, I just turned 71. I celebrated by taking a challenging part time job for a company that I feel confident that I can help.

This, but with the added realization that I seem to be losing brain power and memory quite rapidly. I used to be able to contribute to intelligent conversations, but these days find myself unable to keep up with peers and elders who're still super sharp.

It's terrifying.

Do try to keep in mind a lot of the world had a bit of a social crash and reboot during the pandemic

Of course stay aware of your health, but allow some wiggle room for that when it comes to social concerns

If you have young kids.. that's it. Apparently it gets better. It did for me, had a big dip then came up smarter. Now with our third in the "terrible two" phase I'm in a terrible dip. This time next year I'll be back to my horrific smart, egotistical and demanding self :-)

Interesting. I'd never heard that that could be a cause of cognitive decline.

In any case, no, I have teens. I've been wondering if maybe I caught covid without knowing it (asymptomatic) and this is brain fog.

Something like this turned out to be Lyme for me. Good luck.

Thankfully not a thing in my country :)

Encouraging to hear it gets better, I have a 13 month old and feeling quite slow witted lately.

See a doc mate. Fix sleep, stress, nutrition, exercise.

This could be beginning of alzheimer's. Alzheimer's, like balding, is too often put away like an unpleasant thought until it's really too late to do anything about it. There is an obvious advice here of going to a good doc and having your lifestyle in order, but barring that there really is no sufficiently good treatment yet which is validated by large clinical trials.

But as a last resort, I'd check these papers and search for a doctor or an acquaintance who could help you make sense of the current cutting-edge research and possibly apply it for your case:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4221920/

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/acel.13296

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41593-019-0372-9

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-021-22370-2

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S235239641...

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/med.21702

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=21728830

https://academic.oup.com/advances/article/7/5/905/4616724

https://www.fightaging.org/archives/2020/07/chronic-neurovas...

https://www.fightaging.org/archives/2018/09/an-inflammatory-...

https://forum.age-reversal.net/t/h4b2b5/a-spreadsheet-for-ca...

Do not go gentle into that good night.

We do have dementia in the family (grandmother and aunt), but they both got it after 70. I'm only 40.

I appreciate those links; thank you so much for that. I'll read them, and I'll see a doctor.

Similar to another poster below, I found new modes of existential crisis from not just age but witnessing another's decline. A long-time friend's surprise death by brain cancer started me off with what feels like your observation about time running out.

But watching elderly relatives as their minds melt into dementia and delirium has certainly been more cataclysmic. No matter how much you know about the possibility in theory, the qualitative experience of it in intimate practice is quite another thing. As I've heard from several social workers in the past few years and felt myself, grief wells up for the person who is still in front of you as you keep recognizing the loss of different parts of them or of your relationship to them.

The hardest part may be contemplating the limits of caregiving. I have newfound respect and awe for doctors, nurses, et. al who have to face this throughout their career. You have to acknowledge many limits in yourself and in the patient, including inevitable suffering which you cannot prevent no matter how much clever planning nor deep understanding you can muster.

I reached the same point. I am also helping terminally ill gentleman to have last comfortable days of his life. I literally see how the time is running out.

My wish is to finish my projects allowing my relatives to live ramen-comfortable life without me. Maybe I manage to retire and enjoy the life by myself for a while. I became very materialistic growing up in poverty.

> I am also helping terminally ill gentleman

Goodonya. Caring for the dying changes you in so many ways and can be an ultimately positive milestone of maturity. It can really take it out of you too, so make sure to get enough help to be a help.

> I became very materialistic growing up in poverty.

Currently trying to introspect on this one myself. I'm really not sure how to "get over it".

I'm early-30s and found out this week that the tendonitis in my foot that the doctor swore would clear up "in a month or two" with ice, ibuprofen, and stretching, is actually arthritis. My hair's getting a little thin too. Feeling like I'm past my peak really isn't sitting well with me

@rsyring do you have kids?

I'm also closing in on 40 and have been thinking about the fact that I don't have any strong meaningful relationships in my life. I'm curious whether you've built a family or are planning to?

Reply on news.ycombinator.com