I don't care how much money you've raised
I don't care how much money you've raised. In fact, leading with how much money you've raised makes me doubt that you have your priorities straight.
How about "Hi, we're X. We're solving problem Y by doing Z".
Or, even better:
"Hi, we're X. We solved problem Y by doing Z, and are now seeking to monetize."
Money is certainly important, but raising funding shouldn't be the point of your startup. Doing interesting stuff is more important than funding.