FriendDA
friendda.org
friendda.org
Also: “He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me.”
— Thomas Jefferson, 1813 (https://press-pubs.uchicago.edu/founders/documents/a1_8_8s12...)
FriendDA is a cool concept. As a concept, rather than as a name for any specific terms, I suspect it’s done a ton of good in the industry. It can be a quick way to make folks aware when a causal convo takes a potentially unexpected business turn.
Of course, it’s also fundamentally (mockingly) different in kind from what industry folks mean by “NDA”. As long as all involved get that, it can be useful.
I am just an American lawyer. Working with colleagues from the UK, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada on Waypoint and Guestbook, I was surprised how well one set of terms could serve clients under all those systems.
As an actual NDA, it's too informal. Enforcement, if any, would be a pain.
As a joke between friends, it'd mostly annoy people who have lived long enough to realize friendship's occasionally fall apart in confrontational ways, and that in acrimonious separations, pieces of paper with your signature will be used against you.
My answer in both cases would be the same - "We're signing a contract that gets you free advice. What does it get me?". (In the first case, both sides getting something out of it is a requirement to make it enforceable. In the second one, why am I getting useless paperwork for helping you?)
I can't tell you how many times I've inadvertently blown a secret just because I didn't know it was a secret. It's to the point where as soon as anyone asks me, "Hey, can I tell you something?" I ask for these details.
People think other people should always be able to tell. Some of us can't. I don't just not read minds. I also don't (usually) read social cues.
There's definitely an audience for this. It just isn't you!
If someone tells me something in a one on one or small group conversation, my default assumption is that I should not share that with anyone else. The idea that I would have to tell someone to not share details of a private conversation is crazy to me. Unless stated otherwise, respect people's privacy.
Obviously there are people that gossip, which is kind of the same thing, but also is very much frowned upon.
For example, once a friend told me they were going on vacation to a particular city, but didn't mention it was for another friend's anniversary surprise. When the other friend mentioned they had a trip planned to the same place around the same time, "Oh! [First friend] just told me she's going to be there too! Maybe you guys can meet up together or something! That'd be so fun!" was out of my mouth almost immediately. It never even entered into my mind that there was a reason not to say anything.
I inadvertently ruined a fun surprise just because nobody told me it was a secret. If they had, I wouldn't have said anything!
Having enough close relationships with people who you want to share ideas with (desirable skills, knowledge, connections) is probably part of the problem.
I have lots of close friends in totally different industries.
I have always thought there should be an execution clause. If I share an idea and have not spoken about it for X time then it becomes friend(publicish) domain. At that point anyone I have shared it with could implement it without recourse, it would be nice if they shared the wealth if they made millions.
* “mutual” in this case means both parties agree to that he same terms.