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The startup I was in in the first bust (2001) hired/relocated people 2 weeks before laying everyone off.

In 2001 I had a friend get a job and then get fired with severance before his start date!

That sounds amazing. How do I get in on that ride? :)

Find a company that thinks it's doing well, tell them you can start in three weeks, and then pray for failure?

Unfortunately whenever we test intercessory prayer we find that it doesn't work.