Genuinely happy, of course! I want to see my friends and family succeed in life and enjoy it. I don't feel like a lesser person in any way, I feel proud of them.
I kind of find that hard to believe.
that was all OP was referring too and it's well documented. Honestly you come off as dishonest in this convo as it's quiet a normal emotion to feel and it's not negative per say, it can lead to negative actions but can also push people to do better.
"It doesn't matter if the slight is real or not, its the perception of the person that matters" -- Jimmy Hoffa
I never said I don't feel envy. You jumped to conclusions based on a very little sentence I wrote.
I currently have a very severe skin condition, and I live in a country with 'free' healthcare. I am envious that some people get medical treatment for it and can live a normal life again and some people do not (such as myself).
I don't give a shit if you think I'm dishonest, you do not know me.
Why? Feeling envious is just human nature. Sure, one can argue that in our current society that kind of feeling is "bad", and we should "fix it". I tend to agree, but that you find it bizarre, it's bizarre to me :D
Oh well, maybe you are a machine (based on your nickname), so yeah, machines do not have imperfections (just kidding).
Or maybe it's not and that's just something you tell yourself to feel better about being an asshole.
To me, simply feeling envy (or any negative emotion) doesn't really say anything about the person. Actively stoking negative emotions or acting on them moves the needle in the direction of asshole, though.
Let me tell you how I had envied my cousin when he had a Super Famicom (a.k.a. SNES in North America) with a stash of great games and I didn't (not even the base machine), when I was a kid. He never wronged me. In fact, we were really good buddies when we lived next to each other more than 20 years ago, but I still envied.
I guess you're a saint and the rest of us are just dirty sinners haha.
Envy, as I stated, is just an emotion. What the person does with it is where the moral and ethical sides come into play.
If it pushes me to do better in my life, I'll almost certainly mature past that emotion.
Someone else mentioned meditation and I heartily agree, mindset is how you approach the emotions.
"Anger is a great servant but a terrible Master" -- some guy in a fantasy novel
Or maybe your brother and you have a crush on the same woman. He asks her out and they start dating. You aren't jealous.
Or just suppose you always wanted something at home, a hot tub, a big screen tv, a walk-in closet, a home office, whatever, and you find out your friend has the thing - you'd be envious right?
It seems like you're confusing being envious of someone as a negative feeling towards them, which is why you're getting caught up on the friends and family aspect. It shouldn't matter if it's friends and family - they are often the people you know the most about so you'll find out if they do/have something you want. If you let your envy turn to anger and contempt, that's the negative part, but you don't have to - that's just having a healthy perspective and self-control
- This would absolutely make me jealous, but I've never been in that situation
- No, this is the weirdest one. I have friends who own huge houses (multiple!) and sports cars. I'm happy for their success, I find it genuinely mental that you would be (are? surely you have more successful friends) jealous because your mate has a better car than you. Jesus.
And I'm not "stuck" in the friends and family bit, that's been the whole context of the thread.
Fortunately, empathy and epistemological pluralism can make your life bearable.