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The fallacy of our generation. Except they literally don't. They just don't want their computer to not run out of battery loading your resume driven developed site.

I'd really like to know what kind of customer demands that a website should be 15 MB in size and use thousands of packages.

what are their demands?

pretty sure my Raspberry Pi will just give up after pulling 2000 npm packages and building native modules

You're wrong. I used to run node + mongo on my 3B+ until it died on me one last time :(

It could manage much, much more than that. Now, I haven't tried running Next on it but unless it's worse than Nuxt (which isn't all that fast, really), it should be fine.

These little SBCs are only lacking at GPU tasks

have you tried using a compiled language and a database that isn’t web-scale?

this should fix your dead board /s

No, I am not manly enough :(

Pretty sad about it dying on me, though. This time it wasn't just a borked flash card.

Been waiting for a 5 but it's taking ages