Nerd Dating: Y Combinator/WePay's Bill Clerico & Jenny McCarthy | Hacker News Reader

Nerd Dating: Y Combinator/WePay's Bill Clerico & Jenny McCarthy

bravotv.com

39 pointseknopf21 comments

Episode is next week...kind of awesome!

I've watched this show a few times. I'd highly caution against anyone going on the show if your objective is to actually find a match (as opposed to being on TV for the fun of it).

Patti (the host) will consistently throw the millionaires under the bus and humiliate them at any opportunity so that she can boost her ego. Her main objective isn't to make matches. It's to make good tv, and by extension generate drama. (Bravo's tagline is: 'We love drama')

A lot of the stuff she does is basically shit-testing, and framing. Truth is 90% of the guys bight that stuff, and then you're out. "Women test men for all sorts of reasons, and it’s mostly an unconscious process. Attractive women have a lot of options, and prefer men who are STRONG OF CHARACTER. If you were an attractive woman being chased by hundreds of guys, how would you go about eliminating the losers? You’d TEST them, in subtle ways that test for strength and personality. If you did this on a regular enough basis, this behavior would become unconscious and automatic. Women will ALWAYS test you! Deal with it, learn how to handle it, and move on." [1]

Example I saw in the video.

Patti: "Are you nervous?" ...

Patti: "Do you think she's gorgeous?"

Bill: "She looks gorgeous"

By answering those questions, what Bill did is he bit into the frame and accepted her to control the situation. Notice how Patti leaded the conversation, and Bill played along.

tldr; Patti's not being a bitch, she pretty much doing what every attractive women does to a guy -- only she's doing it with no intention of dating them, rather to quickly dissect the guy

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[1] http://www.fastseduction.com/cgi-bin/fswiki.cgi?Shit_Tests

...and for this exact reason, I can't possibly believe why a "nerd" with the power and status of a startup CEO would go on a show like this. There aren't a lot of nerds who have the social skills to handle the stereotypical attractive Western woman's endless series of tests and burning hoops. And given that this is a TV show meant for entertainment, I don't really see the upside. At least unless you're able to not take this stuff as a joke.

Reality shows are built on the premise of testing people's strength of character, so most of our demographic would just ending up looking like chumps. Which, given the host, is probably the hidden premise of this show -- putting high-status men in a position where they are likely to fail. Unfortunately too much of Western culture is built on the notion of keeping up appearances and maintaining your perceived status, instead of actually having real skills and accomplishments under your belt.

I feel I should chime in since I know BC. I've been dating a girl now for 2 years because of a party he invited me to, and have to admit he handled this way better than I could have (and he has way more game than I do). I was a big wimp when it came down to it: I carried a ring on one of my fingers because I knew if I intentionally "lost" it from a girl I was talking to who I really liked, I had an excuse to go on a first date with her. At some point, this girl (now my girlfriend) at this party gave me her phone, and what else would I do with it besides call myself so that I was guaranteed to get her number? I'm really surprised she talked to me after that. I did get the first date though.

I think the points they made were valid; a lot of women seem to love gossip and things that I don't find interesting, but apparently that's a great way to start/carry a conversation with the type of woman who goes to a bar.

Most women I have met at bars were not interesting to me though. Nearly every girl I've dated has had something nerdy about her and I've met them through my own social circles; my last girlfriend was really into graphic design and the one I'm dating now studied biomedical engineering. Birds of a feather flock together?

Fortunately most women aren't like this. It's still disappointing that a popular show can be so viciously anti-intellectual.

In my experience, women are interested in hearing about the guy's passions, not less so if that passion is building a transformative startup.

In my experience, women are interested in hearing about the guy's passions, not less so if that passion is building a transformative startup.

I don't think it's fair to make that assumption. Passions are awesome, but they'll lose interest if you start describing the intricate details. That's not only true about women, but most people in general. The trick is in how you describe, and not what you're describing.

One remarkable girl had me asking questions for half an hour about shoes, for example. I hate shoes.

Again, it's not about what you talk about RATHER how you talk about it. You're still boring.

The idea behind speaking about your passions is to tell it via a story and also create an emotional connection with the women as you're doing it.

Not only is it dangerously anti-intellectual, it also has some terrible flirting advice.

Telling her that she looks gorgeous? Really?

Actually, the way that Bill COULD have responded would be something like:

She: Do you think she's gorgeous ?

He: She's the most beautiful girl I've seen.....in the past 30 seconds

"She's the 2nd most beautiful girl I've seen.....in the past 30 seconds"

I think I'd rather not be successful at picking up someone who doesn't care about my passions. They don't necessarily have to have the same interests, but if they're completely uninterested and uninterested in you, it's probably not going to go well.

(fortunately my girlfriend has gone from a being a biotech tech worker at a big pharma company to constantly asking about how to start a startup...)

"CEO, Internet Payment Company" -

This guy dropped 600 pounds of ice outside PayPal's dev conference. He really can't get some producer to use his company's name on television? Although after watching the clip, I think I can understand why Bill wouldn't want WePay's name associated with this piece of fine television.

Jenny McCarthy is the antithesis of nerd culture. Why is she associated with us?

I believe the title of the show is "Millionaire matchmaker", the show seems to be propagating the stereotype that men should be wealthy and women pretty. Thus if you're looking for up and coming millionaires the tech industry might not be a bad place to look, especially if you're looking for men who have made their millions before 40.

Box.net founder/cfo was also on this same show.. but don't ask me why i knew that..

http://www.bravotv.com/the-millionaire-matchmaker/season-3/h...

Anyone care to mirror it for us non-US folk?

Nerd represent! The clip was pretty funny. Does anyone know if we will be able to watch the full episode online?

Well played, Bill, well played.

Bill Clerico came off as an Always Frustrated Chump. He needs to shake that off if he wants to be a ladies man. I suggest he start off with a few cover-to-cover readings of The Game.

They already got him started with some advice:

"if you want a 10 you got to be a 10 mentally and physically"

I think you mean average frustrated chump

I stubbornly stand behind my words. An always frustrated chump is way behind the average frustrated chump. Nevermind I stand corrected. I do think it sucks how they edited it so the highlights of it were them hammering him with advice. It's a conspiracy against nerds. It's a SoCal entertainment industry conspiracy against the Silicon Valley. We all know which is better.

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