What the hell? If he wants 30m to himself each day he needs to clear with his wife?
Don't most people get more than 30m free time each day away from their partner? Just what kind of unhealthy relationship is this dude in?
If you have a small child, locking yourself in a room and ignoring external stimuli is actually requesting someone else to do labor for you.
See my reply to myself - it's not a good way at all, nevermind a very good way. After all, it didn't peg me as a parent of a 1yo, did it?
> he needs to clear with his wife?
He is saying "additional". It does not mean total = 30min of free time.
4:30 - 5:00 Change Diaper 5:00 - 6:00 Bounce on knee 7:00 - 8:00 Contemplate on the poor life decisions that lead to this scenario
Yes. With a one year old, esp during COVID, childcare time is time you can’t leave the house, can’t relax, can’t do anything productive. So yes, you make a schedule - you pick them up from daycare, watch them for an hour while I study, then I’ll come make dinner and do bedtime.
- 22yr olds are sexually capable and may reproduce if they choose.
- Some of those might also have internet access.
From internet comments? No, its not.
For employment? Also, no, in the US, except age over 40.
Most people aren’t caring for one year olds.
TLDR: If baby needs $X hours of baby-sitting per day, and mum and dad do baby-sitting together at the same time, they both need $X hours per day to do it. If mum and dad switch roles every 90m-120m, then each parent gets $X/2 free hours per day.
I have a two year old at the moment. Last year he was one. Shortly after he was born (around month 2) my wife and I split the baby-sitting schedule as evenly as possible.
We have very little "together time" with the child (all three of us together) unless we are going out with him. What I insist on is that only a single person is responsible for baby-sitting at any given moment (and the moments are all well-defined).
In practice, this means that if my wife is baby-sitting, I will not be there at all (doing chores, focusing on something else, just relaxing, whatever).
It works the same in reverse: when I am baby-sitting, she is not there at all.
This gives both of us a lot more free time than if we both sit there baby-sitting. There's literally no reason for both parents to wake up when baby needs a 2AM feeding, or when baby needs entertainment (playing peekabo, or whatever), or even when baby is just napping.
My observation of couples with a newborn is that almost always both parents are baby-sitting the child together. In that case, sure, you are going to have a lot less free time. If you split the time equally, both parties get a lot more time.
Personally, due to how our childcare worked, even with a one year old toddler in the house, my wife and I were averaging around four hours of awake me-time per weekday.
If the poster is getting too little free-time each day to find 30m, then redundant baby-sitting is happening.