I believe that all children are born with a burning passion for learning. Some then have it beaten out of them by a slow, routine, inhuman education system that crushes individual creativity.

I try to make up for it with my own children by sending them to regular school, but then encouraging them to self-teach the things that interest them.

I'm sorry that you are unsatisfied in your work. Perhaps if it were economically viable, a long sabbatical would allow you to find more meaning in your life and perhaps a new career. I wish we could all do that when nescessary.