To answer your first question, dilution has little to do with how you structure the equity and more to do with the price at which you sell it (and how much of it you sell). The more your company is worth, the less you will need to sell to raise the same amount of money.
A bunch of older threads on here went down the path of "you're going to get fleeced by your VC, just accept it because they have infinite lawyers."
If you’re anywhere close to taking your company public, you should have attorneys that can help you with preparing for that and point you to whatever information you’re looking for.
At the time of investment, good VCs typically don’t care about any one investment enough to put much effort into fleecing you. My experience is that good startups aren’t at any significant disadvantage in terms of attorneys. Just make sure to get a good one that has done a lot of financings.
I know nonvoting shares are usually a hard sell, but I've seen people pull it off. It's worth reminding investors that they are giving you their money on loan because they do not have business ideas, you do.