The advice here seems generally pretty good, so I'll suggest a different angle. Have you considered leaning into your work? Your career as a developer is going well, why not see how far you can take it? As you point out, your peers are spending time raising families etc, that's time not spent on their careers. There's an often unstated assumption that only one's life outside of work counts when it comes to personal happiness. Does that have to be true? What if your ideal work/life balance is just work?