Work is a terrible place to make friends. The incentives are all stacked against it. People at work are competitive, fearful, distrusting, political, formal, reserved, with worksonas turned up to the max. When people leave the company, the majority of the time the reason for the relationship has ceased. Try to bring people into your life through just about any other activity and you will have better results.

My former roommate who works at LinkedIn spends a lot of time hanging out with friends from work. They do things together multiple times a week. Maybe you should try getting a FAANG job and moving to SF/LA/NYC?

Also, my impression of NYC, more so than any other place I've lived, is that there is a general rejection of the idea that your lifestyle is supposed to change when you're 30.

Have you watched Harold and Maude? I'm not sure what you're expecting friendship to look like and how much you're expecting to get out of it, but maybe try to lower your expectations of others. Think about what you can do for other people, and less about what you need from someone else.