The owner, a Chinese expat, greeted us enthusiastically and personally sat down to serve us tea. The conversation was lovely; she was explaining the source of the tea, the preparation and serving method, etc. and I was just enjoying the experience when she offhandedly asked where he was from.
When he responded, "Taiwan," she immediately frowned and made some terse comment in Mandarin, to which he retorted, also in Mandarin. There was a tense exchange, and then she abruptly turned to me and started asking me questions again in English, changing the subject.
I had not yet learned of the One-China stance, so when we left I asked him what happened. He told me that she admonished him for not saying he was from "Chinese Taipei", and apparently some other nasty remarks he decided not to translate.
It was such a shock to see that level of nationalism exhibit itself in real-time. She was genuinely offended and angry, not annoyed. I suspect if I hadn't been there, she'd have told him to leave immediately.
No-one ever says "Chinese Taipei", certainly not among Chinese, which is just some political compromise, mostly in the Olympic Committee.
The only issue I can think of is if the question was specifically about the country of origin, in which case some people may indeed object to "Taiwan" and argue that it should be "China" instead (but not "Chinese Taipei"...)
I've been asked many times in mainland China where I was from, and I say "Taiwan" without any issues.
Sorry if there is confusion; it was several years ago and I don't remember it word-for-word -- you're probably right about Chinese Taipei. The student was very, very gracious and anglicized a lot of things when translating. He even used an English name in addition to his normal name.
I imagine, for example, the hostess caught some nuance I missed, or followed up in Chinese to confirm his opinion on sovereignty. I was really just following tone and facial expression.
I could call and ask him if he remembers, but from my understanding, he unfortunately has to have difficult conversations like that quite a lot, and I don't know if this one would even stand out.
She was not visiting from China, she literally had been in Europe for more than a decade, and still.
No one, naturally, would blog about it or openly shout on the street but families and friends (from what I've heard) do talk about these political issues.
Not because it's sensitive everywhere, but because it's very sensitive in some places.
I think what you're referring to what is socially appropriate. Most of these topics would be poor taste to discuss in public, but the mere act of doing so wouldn't land you in the back of a windowless van, which is the difference.
Read Koba the Dread by Martin Amis for a powerful, extremely well-written account of it.
For instance, I (in Europe) don't "lightly suggest" things in the US are difficult when it comes to guns/Trump/abortion/etc to American colleagues because these are sensitive political topics and nothing good can come out of that. You mentioned it was in South America so maybe another example would be to mention drug cartels and Pablo Escobar to Colombian colleagues.
I can imagine your Chinese colleagues thinking "here we go again..." and politely stirring the conversation to another topic.
"Lightly suggesting" something is "difficult" is a conversation starter. Not arguing.
Maybe we're getting into "cultural differences" area and we should probably agree to disagree.
I wish people were more charitable on HN, on the internet, and in life.
Separately, plenty of good relationships can discuss politics without issue, and to not do so would leave the world only to their information bubbles.
You said "people", "they", and "them" -- all plural. Did you talk to them separately, one-on-one, or were they afraid of being denounced by each other?