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Comment by conradfr | Hacker News Reader

After reading this article you are given the choice to work with this person, do you say yes or no?

Yes, I'd take work at Apple and work with her. Why wouldn't I? Oh, right, because I'd be fearful of being accused of sexual harassment, right? I have no such fear because I haven't ever experienced those kinds of "misunderstandings," I am not a predator, and I am mature enough to control myself while at work. I'm also not needy, so I don't need to use the workplace to find romance. I respect my colleagues, even the ones I really don't care for, and I show them I respect them with my respectful behavior and by never objectifying them. Other people are ends in themselves, even the very attractive ones, not a means to my solving loneliness or getting off. If a colleague has a grievance, I listen to them and show them I understand rather than dismissing, avoiding, demeaning or attacking them.

You want a medal for being a non-predatory normal decent person ? That's not the point

It's great for you you've lived your life without these kind of "misunderstanding" but fake or overblown (intentionally or not by the 'victim' btw) harassement accusations exist more than you seem to think and it's always coming from the same pattern of people. With time you learn to not ship on the 'victim' bandwagon too quickly and regognize the patterns.

I'd have never thought i'd come to say something like that when I was younger..

I suppose you believe it is easy to come forward once demeaned, that there is some temptation of some benefit or just to get attention at the expense of the reputation of decent, enlightened men being totally normal and merely cast in a false light. But I strongly suspect the exaggeration you interpret does not exist. It isn't possible to accidentally sexually harass. Sexual harassment is very common, false accusations of same is less so. Also common when someone does something wrong, denial, and then downplaying it's severity. And if you haven't noticed, women praise and defend enlightened men. So what you believe simply isn't credible.

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