I am offering a $100k bounty to the person who sets me up with my life parter | Hacker News Reader

I am offering a $100k bounty to the person who sets me up with my life parter

github.com

32 pointsamin48 comments

Love the idea. Would be silly for anyone to be helping him tho: he's essentially disincentivized from ever committing to a partner because a) it's going to cost him a fortune and b) others will continue sending him new candidates.

But if they just want a child it’s kind of more manageable

If he actually wants a partner then that won't be an issue. Will he break up with his partner of 364 days over a mere $25,000?

Ha! Thank you . Well actually I very much am incentivized to commit to a partner. Money doesn’t make me happy on its own.

A loving relationship, very much does. Hence I’m exchanging money to optimize for what I want.

I’ve had a few awesome relationships before. Esp when things were going well, there would be no way I would break up for $100k. What good would it do me?

I was extremely blessed to land in a field making a comfortable, nearly guaranteed living. I love money as much as the next person. But…it’s a means to reach happiness and fulfillment. Not the fulfillment itself.

> I’ve had a few awesome relationships before.

;)

LOL, now nobody is going to respond to that other guy because he's only offering 2k. And now that we're talking serious amounts of money, it would be foolish for anyone to attempt to earn this bounty without signing a contract in advance.

Good chance that being there & getting to tell the story about what happened- even if it becomes a tale about getting ripped off- could end up netting you nearly as much, be just as valuable an experience as connecting & getting paid for it.

There's probably a TED-esque talk in it for every party involved. I am looking forward to reading the books written about the 2020s 20-30 years from now

No thanks I'll have the money

Lmao yes. I don’t know how OP found my repo. But the fact that it’s on HN w/o a day after I made the repo is saying something. My GH isn’t exactly spectacular or well followed. I have basically 0 real social media presence. Yet somehow the inter webs tracked it down.

I already got a few emails. Already got someone with a documentary interested in chatting w/ me and Mati.

I have a lot of stupid and impractical ideas. A LOT. This might just be on the more practical side.

As for ppl ripping it off - I very much *want* ppl to rip off this idea. I don’t care so much about the credit. I like credit as much as the next guy, but I want more than credit is for this idea to come to be, and help me find a life partner. The more ppl are “ripping off” my idea, the bigger the market for folks who are willing to connect me to what I actually want.

You may say I ripped of Mati in a way. Mati couldn’t be happier lol.

That’s why the repo is under Creative Commons. Go for it, fork it, use it. You have my legal blessing.

We actually talked about it in the original FB thread. I’m actually very much helping Mati.

$2k - nobody is gonna take it seriously. Professional Matchmakers already get paid $10-30k for no results guaranteed. Why would they move a finger over $2k? The thing is…we don’t want a professional match maker. We want someone in our circles/communities who already happens to know quality people, to be incentivized to connect us to someone they personally know.

Every quality relationship I’ve been in was introduced by a friend. My last one, my best friend was dating her, we were briefly in a triad together, and then monogamously started dating.

So…how does my $100k bounty help Mati? Well…there is no market for what we’re asking for. It’s kinda a weird idea. Our friends might be like “oh this is kinda cool” and help us. But they’re already our friends. If they knew someone perfect for us, they’d introduce us for free.

We want friends of friends of friends to introduce us. And for that…they need to know we’re 100% serious about this.

As for the contract - well, it would be trivial to have my attorney draft something up. But since I work in DeFi, I’d like to actually make a scalable crypto solution. Basically we will create a custodial wallet, where potential partners “stake” a percentage of the total bounty, as a proof of funds and interest. Nobody gets access to the funds until the terms of the contract are triggered. They can still be used in certain transactions and appreciate in value. They could even be in the form of a currency linked to this project, and appreciate in value as the market grows.

Now of course, I could very well find a technicality to screw you out of your bounty. But…is that really in my best interest? I’m assuming you and my partner-to-be are good friends. Would my partner really think well of me for screwing over their friend for a few gran? I mean I definitely would not date someone like that.

Mocking the mentally ill/unstable is distasteful behaviour, IMO. So is using their web presence to score karma points. HN is better when it doesn’t traffic in this sort of thing.

I...what?

Did I miss several steps in this conversation?

Aww thank you

Well, I, the author of the repo, very much give my blessing to the OP for scoring karma points with my idea.

I’ve been mocked my entire life for being non neurotypical. I stopped caring a long time ago. The people who actually matter very much appreciate my quirkiness. And it’s an amazing filter to find those people.

At first read this seems ridiculous, but then I thought about it for a minute and am less certain. I guess at this point why the hell not? Seems like a lot of gray area though. I'm curious to see if anything actually comes of this. What a time to be alive. For what it's worth, odd public mechanisms or no, I do hope everyone finds someone as special to them as my wife is to me.

I'm betting this is satire. He hasn't included a dating profile, which seems like table stakes for a serious attempt.

I am 100% serious. I just haven’t had the time to write my profile yet. But I will this weekend :)

Mati and I have very much similar preferences in partners. I am slightly less child and eternal preservation focused. But other than that we are very much aligned. So if it works for Mati’s profile. Probably works for mine.

This person is a high-functioning aspie [1] who is well-groomed and relatively attractive.

One interpretation of this post is that a good dating site aimed specifically at people on the spectrum may be able to charge its users substantial amounts of money compared to what you can charge neurotypicals because perhaps people on the spectrum recognize more accurately in dollar terms how valuable it is to solve the partnership problem and have less mystical thinking around it.

[1] https://tolicodes.com/

Absolutely :)

I have had a lot of trouble in my teens getting dates. I was weird as fuck. Still am lol.

But it very much turned into a plus in my adult hood. As you said, I’m not physically unattractive. Especially when I eat right, work out, put in some time into my appearance.

More importantly, I’m quite smart, can be very passionate, exciting, adventurous, and super loving.

I had major body issues in early adulthood, thinking I couldn’t find love because I was short or didn’t have a six pack, or whatever. Over the years, I learned that doesn’t matter all that much. I mean being 6’ looking like Matt Bomer does not hurt your chances hahahaha. But my looks are not so much a limiting a factor as other things.

In my last relationship, I was more or less dating the girl of my dreams in all respects. She was hot. She was passionate. She was exciting. Smart. Creative. Sex life was beyond anything I imagined. I lost my front tooth in our relationship. It didn’t change our sex life one bit (well it did actually but that’s a longer article haha).

So I very much proved to myself that past a certain point, if someone likes you and is physically attracted to you, it doesn’t matter all that much how many “packs” your abs have. It helps…but it’s not a pre-requisite. There are lots and lots of other things you can optimize for that are more bang for the buck.

As for a dating site for aspies - absolutely. Would love that. One of the biggest challenges is explaining to someone why I am the way I am. If ppl already know…that saves a bunch of time and heartache.

These people are incels plain and simple. There isn't much difference between this and human trafficking.

Forget the money, but I have gone through a divorce and remarriage (very happy and grateful! approaching 9 years), and thought at great length about the process (to put it mildly), ... ...and wrote what I learned at my site (in my profile, then click "other", "life lessons", "dating and marriage", then the "DOCUMENT" (but really everything from the dating and marriage page). (I used eHarmony conscientiously and it worked out well for me, but I also have specific opinions about them; available if you ask.) It has advice for finding and staying married. But I say forget the $ because it is more up to you than me, whether you succeed.

The docs at my site reflect my beliefs, which are a big part of our relationship -- but I truly hope there are useful things in it for anyone. Happy to answer questions or discuss (my email is in the site footer). Feedback appreciated, and I wish you the best.

Also: I suggest considering that sexual license and self-centeredness in general, are not associated with multigenerationally happy/loyal families. Traditional values are such because .. they have worked for a long time. In observing families that I know of that are happy across generations (dealing successfully with life's real challenges because of commitment and shared beliefs), I see that, among other things, the successful parents and family members are those who are more interested in the comfort and well-being of their spouse and kind/responsibly/loving training of children than in their own pleasure, power, or attention. We today really aren't so much smarter than what the 10 commandments can give us. Really. I have written about the various ways I have come to that conclusion -- like algebra or arithmetic -- get the same answer several different ways, and one can feel confident about it.... questions welcome.)

I would love to read your documents! Can you please link to your site?

I think you will have to click my username "lcall" then find the url there, for my personal site, then follow the instructions in my earlier comment. It appears I posted links to my site a few times too many (thinking I had written valuable content, I suppose; nothing for sale), and comments linking to my site are now shadow-banned. Dang (the admin) was kind though, and I'm not totally banned. :) Let me know if that doesn't work. Suggestions (here or emailed; address is in site footer) are appreciated.

It won’t be long until we see “Show HN: I made Bride Bounty, an aggregator / saas for managing your prospects”

And then parner-found insurance, speculative markets.. Leading to the creation of 4o1k cupid, a retirement savings plan built around bride bounty speculation.

4o1k cupid . Fuck yes. That made my morning.

I’ll tell my hedge buds to get ready for the new hot derivative ;).

Ahh yes this is why I come to Hacker News

Yeah I'm sure any woman would love to date this guy who is financially incentivised to get rid of her on a "typical VC vesting schedule".

What a dork.

Get rid of?

> I am currently contracting for a fintech startup, grossing ~$25,000/mo

Is this guy super wanted or are these typical salaries in the US for contractors?

That is not much in the grand scheme of top tech salaries and as a contractor you get no benefits so this seems believable.

In crypto.

Ha. My next job is in crypto actually (NFTs). My current one is run of the mill fintech.

But yes…I am very much on the lower end of what qualified engs make.

Just wanna say…thank you amin for posting this :)

And thank you all for so much love and support. I woke up this morning to this thread and it made my day

https://www.seeking.com/ ? lol.

But is it on Ethereum smart contract? How do we guarantee payments? I pity this person’s future partner.

Actually if there is enough interest, that’s exactly what I have planned.

It’ll basically be a custodial proof of funds wallet

Actual dating services exist that cost a lot less. And they have access to women who aren’t on GitHub.

I don't know why he doesn't just pay women for their time, and skip the middle man.

Oh I have . Believe me…I am very open minded when it comes to this stuff. I’ve got “sugar daddy” friends. Doesn’t work for me.

At the end of the day, you can’t buy love. But you can incentivize people to help you find it.

Isn't that what he's doing?

How about $2000 per month for the life of the relationship?

I was considering something like that but more on the income investment option.

I’d gladly pay 10% of net income for the life of the relationship.

So in 2000 when GWB was running for election, Dick Cheney was the lead of the VP selection committee. He chose himself.

A woman could just pretend to be the middle man, and introduces herself to you.

Round trip plus hotel to Pattaya less than $2K.

oh god this is like the unholy alliance of tech-bro culture and arranged marriage, I honestly can't even tell if it's satire or not.

Also 100k over four years might be literally enough to get straight up scammed

I’ve lost ~$250k in < 1 mo in stupid decisions.

$100k for 4 years…I’ll take that :)

Let me introduce you to your right hand. That's your life partner right there.

No problem. I take payment in cash or crypto.

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