> Is not spying considered an attack on those you are spying on?

It depends on the meaning of “attack.” Spying against a country inside their country is generally illegal in that country but is also not generally treated as an act of war. Spy satellites are not even in the target’s territory and are not doing anything to the target’s territory or their stuff. There isn’t really any rationale to call it an attack. Attacking the satellite though is attacking their stuff, of course everyone does it, but has a better rationale for the word “attack.”

Seems like there is a difference between passive spying (say monitoring radio transmissions from international waters or taking pictures from space) vs active spying (conducting intelligence operations on foreign soil or hacking a network)

It's not the job of any military to be fair.