Come to terms? Not always understanding something right away is a normal experience. How to come to terms with not liking some food? With not feeling like working today? You either try harder or give up and move on. You should reset your expectations, because no one understands everything right away.
I don't know how (maybe from the TV shows i grew up watching) but my brain got programmed to expect that i will understand something right away, which in reality is really stupid. I understand that i put a huge burden on me when i expect something like this but i can't stop it. I knowledge it but i can't internalize it and "come to terms" even though i want it very much.
I'm not a doctor but what you describe may be symptoms of OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder). You can get treatment from a therapist (cognitive behavioral therapy can help with OCD). You can also take meds that may work but the side effects make that option less attractive.