That hasn't been my experience with LLCs. If you're making money and you're a founder, you need an accountant full stop. But having said that: you make distributions, and the principals pay self employment tax. Where's the big deal?
Here's where I get jumpy on this stuff:
S- and C- corporations are complex enough to put people off until they get a lawyer. Most startup founders probably don't have a lawyer when they start.
When you say "LLCs are a nightmare", besides the fact that they're aren't for most people (they aren't even notably complicated for most people; that's the point), and that it's not that hard to switch out of an LLC when things get complicated (by that point, you have a lawyer)...
... besides those things, you're also probably effectively talking people out of incorporating at all. That's more than suboptimal; it's dangerous. It creates situations where you can be personally liable for all sorts of company expenses. We've had HN posts from people who were told by cofounders and business partners that they were personally liable for huge expenses, and had those same people discovered they owed zero because they were incorporated.
Don't do business as a sole proprietor. Get a structure with limited liability as soon as you can. If it's between an LLC now and an S-Corp "maybe 6 months from now, maybe earlier if we can find a good lawyer and we're making money" --- do the LLC.
You're the expert here. Where am I wrong in this analysis?