Then why post it online?
In the digital world, this hits a wall of “the security mechanisms don't integrate with the nuances of human social understanding directly” and gets split off into “posts that are technically public but not really addressed to the public” and “invite-only areas which would probably be okay being somewhat more open but lack a good way of moderating this without leaving things open all the way”.
If it is online, it is public. I’m not understanding why that wasn’t the expectation here.