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I am a programmer but I live near DC. Finding something from here is difficult.

DC is still not a horrible market. What are your specialties? Would you consider living elsewhere to save your career?

I would like to be in NY/NJ area. A recent family tragedy makes me want to stay close.

Moments like this remind me I don't have much in common with most people.

Is my wanting to stay with family a rare thing?

It should be a common thing for his phrase to make sense...