Contract for Sale of Soul
liminalwarmth.com
liminalwarmth.com
I have to wonder how lawyers do their job. I've read chapters of academic text for my own knowledge, but somehow this legal writing style crushes me every time.
How do we all just tap away at these buttons-with-letters all day?
What's in these "few hundred pages"?
Also the disclosures have copious language to the effect of "To the best of sellers' knowledge" and "Buyer agrees to do their own research". I think this is supposed to indemnify the seller.
Just as an example, imagine you buy a house from me that turns out to have foundation issues. Imagine I hadn't disclosed them, but I had actually filled in and painted over a number of cracks in the wall. That could possibly be construed as an effort to cover up the problem and deceive. But maybe I just thought I was making it look nice.
In short, mandatory disclosures protect the buyer, not the seller. The seller gains nothing.
What comprises the house - garden etc. size of different parts.
the house is shared with a neighbor, requirements for the sharing of house with neighbor.
what parts of the shared areas are yours (a walk in closet downstairs and some weird crawl space in a wall)
known problems with house that the seller has told me of.
all the things you named.
An evaluation of the house condition for insurance purposes.
on edit: formatting
It wild be much easier to have a 3 pages agreement with references but how would the notary explain their costs?
Au least as a seller and buyer you are safe.
Apparently this sort of errors is common enough that the law has already support for handling them as "irrelevant", but this proved to me people seldomly read law stuff accurately.
>>Seller agrees to honor the spirit of this agreement
Big red flag there. I have never run across anyone with legal training using "spirit" language.
>>ignorance of any consequences ... will not invalidate the enforceability
More novel language not from any legal treatise. And, by way of further example, a lawyer would have dropped the useless "the" before enforceability.
I know what you mean (and agree), but some spirit language seems required by the subject matter :-)...
Legalisms don't make for particularly hard contracts.
In the real world, I've found complexity is often caused by attempts to simplify the contract. Or perhaps to simplify its drafting.
The most common offender is the overuse of Definitions which are often Capitalised Definitions. Interestingly in code you might compare it to the use of a function (); except that in the real world you can't easily call a function - you physically have to flick back and forth between pages to understand what the contract means.
The other cause of complexity is when parts of the contract aren't written by lawyers, but by engineers or risk analysts. Which the lawyers will do to simplify their job. I've seen some of these contracts and after weeks I can't understand them. A judge interpreting this contract basically has to become an expert in the relevant subject area. I don't envy them.
Sometimes it's fairly confined. Usually they don't need to understand the whole thing.
But the interpretation isn't piecemeal and usually requires understanding the background.
Well, when a function is called the computer does this as well. And it drags me along with it when I am in a debugging session with a debugger on :P
I find the language of common law, its richness, and history to be quite fascinating. The nuances and details it is able to convey are astounding.
Legal doublets such as "cease and desist" or "terms and conditions" are an example of this. These phrases originated when multiple languages (i.e., Norman French, Middle English, and Latin) were used simultaneously in English society.
Often consisting of two near synonyms, one from an Anglo-Saxon / Old English origin, one from a French or Latin one, these doublets helped with clarifying intent for readers with different native language backgrounds.
I just realized several other people posted this. But hopefully the devil will take a moment to update before posting this again to HN three months hence.
Also not sure why this contract is relevant when everyone's already agreed to Apple and Facebook's TOS.
I dunno, you are talking about someone who lost a golden fiddle to some hick kid from Georgia[1].
The Devil clearly can't just take souls without their owner's consent, so he needs to project an air of trustworthiness. There's a serious power asymmetry between mortals and the Devil, and the only higher authority one could think of is God himself. One suspects that God wouldn't easily take the Devil's side, so it behooves (heh) the Devil to be seen as honourable as possible, to ensure smooth and continued soul acquisition.
It is possible the author intended something else, but this interpretation is the closest to Catholic doctrine I have seen. IIRC I am remembering it from a priest's comments on the song.
"Those who study demonology quickly realize that any power lies with the demons." - Some DND manual.
The kid knowingly commits a deadly sin (pride) and the Devil rewards him for it to reinforce the behavior. Certainly on the path to an eternal musical gig in Hell.
You could drive a truck through this Seller loophole.
There it's a richer guy buying the soul from an atheist communist ("just in case") tho, rather than the devil.
0: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Return_of_Don_Camillo
> SECTION III. COMPENSATION FOR TRANSFER
> A. Buyer agrees to compensate Seller with an amount of no less than ten (10) United States Dollars for the transfer of the Soul within 48 commonly recognized Earth-hours of the receipt of the signed agreement via any medium, physical or electronic, as described in Section II-C, according to the conditions outlined in this Section (III).
> B. The sending of these funds (hereafter “the payment”) shall occur via PayPal.com and shall be sent to an electronic mail address provided by the Seller.
I believe that contract law would dictate that unless the Buyer is able to make a significant fraction of the payments, the contract is effectively null due to material breach.
What happens if the buyer and seller are the same? Does the soul remain in place or transfer out and back?
Are the input fields sanitized against injection attacks such as this?
BUYER: Black Phillip
DATE: 1637-10-31 Addendum: Seller additionally agrees to perform any acts of VVitchcraft requested by the Buyer.
SELLER: Tomasin
DATE: 1637-10-30Does this mean that Christians would be bound to being baptized prior to selling their soul?
And even if you could “sell” it, in the sense that you could reject God and thus one’s own good and choose instead your own self-destruction (hence the irrationality of evil), you could always repent and receive the sacrament of penance. Therefore, no such contract would be binding.
> SECTION III. COMPENSATION FOR TRANSFER > A. Buyer agrees to compensate Seller with an amount of no less than ten (10) United States Dollars for the transfer of the Soul within 48 commonly recognized Earth-hours of the receipt of the signed agreement via any medium, physical or electronic, as described in Section II-C, according to the conditions outlined in this Section (III).
If a person signs a contract that has a mandatory, binding arbitration agreement, he or she gives up the right to go to court.
Lol. Sometimes the world truly is just hilarious.
[0] https://www.projekt-gutenberg.org/heineth/maerchen/chap001.h...
Textbook indoctrination
Don't worry, I can sell you a replacement. I have plenty in stock, I swear! So feel free to take one extra, just in case yours goes bad or something.
Btw.: I can also sell you karma if you need some. That would be $10/Gy
However, this contract does AFAIK leave open the possibility that you have more than one soul; in that case, you could sell your other souls. Just not the one you already sold. I think.
I can't tell if this is a joke/troll or you're suggesting that religious belief requires brain-washing.