I never mentioned any particular kind of federation that I prefer. I also never mentioned word "private", which is mostly tangential to federation.
My point is that, in the long run, only federated systems are sustainable, because nobody is able to fund huge servers with millions of users without infinite money. For example, Signal and Telegram are both struggling with that currently; the latter introduced advertisement recently. On the other hand, Mastodon does not seem to have such problem (you could argue that it's too early though).
I do not want to build my own clients, I'm not even a programmer. I want a sustainable network, which could be achieved by a large number of self-hosted instances federated with (possibly) large servers. It has been working fine with email for decades. Also, the competition of various independent clients improves the user experience (like any other healthy competition elsewhere).