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Comment by leesec | Hacker News Reader

No idea why you would write this up or share it honestly. Call me old fashion but I wouldn't want to do business with someone who scream irrationally as loud as they can in response to simple questions or during business meetings. Especially since the outcome didn't lead to anything, just was 'something different'. Truly what is the message here?

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Honestly being in the room I didn't feel screamed at. I felt like we finally got to the real reason why he was passionate about this problem/company. We just had a wade through all the "pitch stuff". I still think he ID'd a huge widespread problem that we still need a solution for.

That's fair, thanks for your clarification then.

I probably would have funded the guy (haven't seen the graveyard myself doing these interviews over the years, TBF), too, or at least kept in touch, as mwseibel did. The article made it sound like this wasn't lashing out in an inflammatory way, it was impassioned frustration.

And for every single self-serving puff piece out there about getting rejected from the YC interview, I'd say this one stands out as one of the few that are genuine.

I don’t get the niece problem… it’s not a lack of itinerary but a lack of time. If I had a relative / friend visit … we’ll I wouldn’t care if we had to just sit in a Starbucks or even McDonalds or do the most obvious tourist stuff as long as there is time.

You wouldn't care, but the niece wouldn't have any interest. I think that's the point, create another outlet for cool activities.

Ok I think I get it. It presumes you both have made time to do the activity.

My thoughts are … well there is timeout / lonelyplanet / TripAdvisor / meetup / city subreddits etc. so there is no shortage of ways to find cool things to do from 4 yr old to 100 year old!

I have a feeling that if successful a site like mentioned would devolve into a groupon or redbaloon though as it searches for more revenue.

The message is written at the end of the post:

> The lesson that I walked away with was to listen to that pain, no matter how irrational it may seem in the moment... I’ve been learning to listen and to trust my emotions in less desperate situations in the years since the YC interview.

I do not think the author is claiming you should shout about your niece in a YC interview. They told a pretty interesting anecdote and gave the insight they gained from it.

Not to be rude but your comment seems kind of like it should just be a downvote (or I suppose a withheld upvote).

I tend to find when someone starts a sentence with "not to be rude" or "with all due respect" or "I don't disagree", this person's subconscious is telling them "hey don't say this thing you're about to say because..."

And then the person just tells their subconscious to take a back seat and prefaces their statement with a dismissive phrase.

how did you come to believe in this theory?

  > how did you come to believe in this theory?

Eliza bot?

Heh. Just curious about the origin of this pretty detailed knowledge about other people's subconscious thoughts...

It could also mean:

"I'm struggling to find the right words, and the only ones I've found don't reflect the note I'm trying to sound."

There has to be some irony in you writing a passive aggressive reply over me adding in "not to be rude" in an attempt to not sound passive aggressive myself.

Maybe the irony is in me taking the bait and writing a passive aggressive reply to your passive aggressive reply.

For me, anytime I've used any variation of "with...respect" it stands in as a polite substitute for "Fuck You" just before I tell them exactly why they are full of shit.

That's just me though.

I'm sure that you didn't mean to be rude, but you came off that way. That's fine, I also have a hard time articulating a balance between tone and content.

That's why I tend to preface comments that may be perceived as rude with a statement that it is not my intention.

The problem is that so many people use that phrase who actually do intend to be rude, so it has lost all meaning. There’s no point in using it any more.

All right, that is a valid point.

I always read “with all due respect” as “I totally disagree but I also feel you are incredibly wrong, and would like to raise this in a way that gets us to detach our egos from our positions so we can dig into this”.

It does not always work to do this, mind you.

My takeaway, more than anything else — as someone who has never interacted with Michael Seibel — is immense respect/admiration for how well he handled it — staying focused on the true goal (understanding the pitch) and in the process coaxing out something even the entrepreneur couldn’t easily vocalize, and along the way gracefully de-escalating the situation.

There are a lot of ways the situation could have ended up with negative value for everyone involved, and it took a bit of skillful steering to turn it into something valuable. That level of emotional composure seems worth developing.

If you don't want to do business with people who are weird and erratic, you're probably not going to be great at seed investing.

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