Why do you assume programming langauges with female coded names are because the creator is viewing it as a girlfriend?
Not all creators are heterosexual males (or otherwise oriented toward females as preferred or even acceptable romantic partners), and even those that are don’t necessarily view women exclusively through the lens of romantic involvement such that that would be the implication of a female name. Also, not all female-coded names are actually female in reference (Janet is named after a character that is expressly not a woman.)
> A programming language doesn't feel much anthropomorphizable to me, let alone lady-like.
Why “let alone lady-like”? Why are female-coded names a particular issue, if the problem is that programming languages aren't “anthropomorphizable”? (I don't actually think naming things after people is inherently about anthropomorphization; we do it to freeways and bridges and other things as an honor, not as anthropomorphization.)