Nearly 40% of adults from 25-54 are unpartnered [Pew Research]

The 3% difference in partner/unpartner rates of men vs women is entirely accounted for by the 4% difference in being institutionalized (e.g. in prison). Really these types of studies should control for this.

> I don’t think our society is setup for singles, particularly singles as the majority. And we are getting pretty close. These findings are really interesting.

Social reproduction is the primary requirement to have a society in the first place, and adult singles don't participate in social reproduction at anywhere near the rates of married couples.

This is something that the society has to discourage in order to remain viable. Historically those who can't or won't participate in that process have taken on service roles that promote social reproduction, for example with nuns teaching schools, or priests reproducing the faith. People like this, together with widows, are really the only singles that are accepted by societies that survive across time, the others being subject to some social disapproval.

If you lose that drive to survive and perpetuate your society, which all western liberal societies have, then it's just a question of making people more comfortable as the entire society shuffles off the game board. We are truly a Ship of Fools.

> Unpartnered adults have lower earnings, on average, than partnered adults and are less likely to be employed or economically independent. They also have lower educational attainment and are more likely to live with their parents.

Although true, that might be reversing correlation and causation. It is quite easy to see why someone might struggle to attach themselves to a partner if they live with their parents, have low educational attainment and no job.

On the old end of that band...

When I was in SV during the dot com boom, the combination of the gender imbalance in the area (I seem to recall it being about 80 single women for every 100 single men between the ages of 20 and 29), the lack of having any firm tie to the area (no hope of getting a house - it was all single bedroom apartment rentals) and the, lets call it "cost of courtship" - it really didn't make financial sense to invest too much time or heart into dating and trying to get married.

Later and elsewhere, the expectation that I'd be the single source of income for a family of a previously divorced woman and step kids was a distinct turn off for trying to pursue a relationship later.

Having siblings get married, have kids, and get divorced and the continued difficulties with that a decade later makes marriage and kids even less appealing to someone who has never had either to see what benefit they provide (yes, I'm sure they do - I just don't know what it is in relationship to my own investment of time, money, and heart).

Now, I'm going to say I'm a grumpish graying beard who's too set in his ways.

Sure, it would be nice to have a partner in life to take some of the household decisions. Managing a house as a single adult is more difficult and expensive than doing it with a partner, but the degree of change that I am expected to make accommodations in my life just makes it feel not worth it to even try to pursue.

And as I write this, I'll note that I do have at least a bachelor's degree, I am employed, my salary is well above the median earnings reported, and I am not financially vulnerable; nor am I living in my parents' home, institutionalized, or have any children in the household. So in those respects for this survey, I'm atypical.

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Aside: https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2017/10/11/the-share-o... is an earlier reporting of the data based on the 2007 - 2017 data.

Unfortunately biology doesn't treat everyone as equals. Women most often end up with the burden of raising the children. Marriage has a lot to do with making a commitment to stick around and help raise the kids.

I’ve long given up on this idea that it’s perpetuated. If people want something, that’s what they want, no different than having a race or body type preference in a partner. What’s the alternative, to tell people the relationship attributes they want is wrong? Can’t squeeze the human out of the person.

In similar fashion, educated women won’t date down, while men will [1]. Should we tell them that’s wrong? I don’t think that’s reasonable nor feasible.

[1] https://www.google.com/search?q=educated+women+dont+date+dow... (quick glance through first two pages of results)

>>>Sad to see this harmful stereotype still being perpetuated. Men need to be empowered to be stay-at-home spouses.

Studies and anecdata indicate that stay-at-home husbands have higher divorce rates, and lower rates of spousal satisfaction.[1][2] In other words, the wives who say they are comfortable with their husbands sitting at home with the kids...actually aren't. Trying to socially engineer that out of women's psyches will be about as successful as trying to convince them to date men who are shorter than them.

[1]https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/parenting/fathers-day/s...

[2]https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-3710922/The-...

Evolution and Darwinism might have a differing opinion though…

Woman are smart enough to prefer men who are more successful in life. That is not going to change any time soon.

What in particular is broken with child support? And I don't understand what you mean by "paternity" here.

Those who disagreed with my comment very obviously haven't had to counsel men going through family court. Multiple relatives have needed assistance to do so. Family court and everything around divorce is entirely made more difficult than it ever should be. Broken is an understatement.

I encourage all sane, socially-well-adjusted, financially-stable men to simply date overseas. Excepting the recent COVID problem impairing travel, your dating pool is essentially all 3.5 billion women on the planet. Especially if you are willing to work remotely, there is almost no incentive to restrict yourself to your domestic regional/national women. Finding a fertile LOYAL childless woman with tolerable political views is not that difficult. You just need to search off the beaten path in developing countries. And then STAY OVERSEAS. Most countries don't have America's costly and misandrist divorce/alimony laws.

I'm heading into the same situation.

I wonder if there's a way to match with equally wealthy partners. I suspect there aren't that many out there.

You can get a prenup. If you do "raise someone else's kids" though and they like you you will have people in old age to help you and visit. Otherwise it's the nursing home staff.

We need a central baby bank to target a minimum fertility rate... People will call it out because it failed to reach its target.

The baby bank will do baby QE, it will buy birth certificates and in exchange pay college tuition. Then people will say that baby QE does nothing. Just because people can pay tuition doesn't mean they actually go to college.

I don't think youu're far off. Similar happened in Japan and men (and women) became apathetic to sex or they sought sex services (soaplands) and near-sex alternatives like enjo kosai/mitsu (paid dates). We're just late to the sad party. In any event, we know "demand" for these "remote" in the sense of "removed" relationships is there.