Adda as a Way of Life | Hacker News Reader

Adda as a Way of Life

bbc.com

85 pointsramirez6035 comments

Brings back memories of my grandpa. We used to roam around the streets of Kolkata and surprisingly he had a tonne of friends nearby. Just a walk with my grandpa to the local tea store would take 2-3 hours. Because he would be busy with adda. Topics used to range from why Buddhadeb (Chief minister of West Bengal, India ) was not working upto the mark to why Tendulkar is the greatest cricket player alive. Things also used to get heated between people sometimes ( mostly due to differences in political opinion )

Otherwise it used to be chilled out. Me, Dadu ( grandpa in bengali ), warm cup of tea and indistinguishable chattering used to be a big part of my summer breaks.

Your grandad sounds like a legend. I think this social norm is a good way for people to be more engaged with their community and probably helps in old age too if you have a stream of buddies to chat with, who enjoy your company.

Better than just ignoring everyone or being seen as nuts, as is the case in NA cities.

Dense urban areas where residents have to walk rather than drive probably helps in creating such a culture.

Kind of a same experience, my nana (maternal grandfather) use to sit on his front patio every day in the evenings. He would talk to people passing by on the street and sometimes a group of people would gather around him and they would just chat away drinking tea and eating biscuits that they would buy from a hawker passing by.

Living in the US, thats what I miss most about India, the social experience. Though the quality of life is much better here. Articles like this incite that nostalgic melancholy that I have learnt to suppress very well.

The US is mostly a lonely, socially atomized place. When I was growing up in Los Angeles, we still had a lot of smokey coffee houses that would stay open until 2am or later and encourage conversation. Those were all killed by Starbucks, and the smoking ban, and the culture of bringing laptops and cell phones and work into the cafe. We still have bars of course, the last place to socialize in America, but it's a different type of socialization since everyone is drunk.

I believe there has been major damage to the ability of Americans to hold an interesting conversation as a result of this change. It is almost seen now as a rare skill.

A similar phenomenon exists in the UK though I don’t think it has a name (crack/craic is close: “what’s the crack?”), and is more related to how you (and your friends) are wired, though it is a common occurrence in pubs across the country.

North America (Canada specifically) is much less open to these kinds of discussions, though that could just be my social circle (or lack thereof) and it feels kind of lonely.

The closest thing I could compare it to is when potheads get together to smoke and you end up talking about random stuff. The difference being that in my experience Canadians like to stay indoors and discuss safe topics eg music and other media.

Granted, a major driver of this when I lived in the UK was boredom (and cannabis) but even when I visit my now mature friends from back then, we still like to take a brisk walk and shoot the breeze, just sober (OK, maybe with a few beers and cigarettes)

I think one point here is that people in India aren’t shying away from politics and religion. Robust conversations about fundamental questions are the norm. (Spoken as an non-Desi with a bit of travel and work experience in south India).

Yep, discussion of politics is probably the second most common topic, first one being Cricket. Friends and neighbors agree to disagree though it has been getting quite polarized these days.

> I think one point here is that people in India aren’t shying away from politics and religion. Robust conversations about fundamental questions are the norm. (Spoken as an non-Desi with a bit of travel and work experience in south India).

This is possible because the number of people who can sarcastically take on politicians is much larger than any group of people feeling strongly attached to said politicians.

> North America (Canada specifically) is much less open to these kinds of discussions, though that could just be my social circle (or lack thereof) and it feels kind of lonely.

The US particularly is so hyperindividualistic and isolating.

> Granted, a major driver of this when I lived in the UK was boredom

Nothing wrong with boredom that leads to long walks and discussions. I think we need more of that kind of boredom in the US.

> Nothing wrong with boredom that leads to long walks and discussions. I think we need more of that kind of boredom in the US.

But then how will your existence be monetized? /s

Don't most cultures in the world (outside of the US) engage in these kinds of discussions? I lived in Italy for a few months and as I was walking around the city I'd often come across groups of 2 to 4 men standing on a corner engaged in a passionate conversation. I might see them as I entered a store to shop and when I came out 30 minutes later they'd still be at it.

I'm kind of envious - it's really something we don't have in the US because we're such an isolated culture.

It happens in the US, but the physical structure of cities makes it much harder. With dwindling downtown areas and a preference to commute by car you have few opportunities for the happenstance meeting with others (strangers and friends and acquaintances).

The places I've experienced it in the US were on college campuses, in older east coast cities with a different structure than the normal US city, and smaller towns with a still existing downtown (which is not all of them, many downtowns in the US are strictly places of business, or worse declined to just a couple government buildings).

It's very rare in the US. Adda is quite literally wasting time on conversations. It cannot thrive in an environment where time is money and money is sacred.

The subjects of this article would probably disagree with you:

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/nbcblk/black-barber-shops-salon...

This is close enough but the big difference between an adda and a salon is that the salon is still a commercial establishment.

Adda is such gatherings anywhere. On the streets, rooftops, temples, parks, local tea stall, something called as a clubhouse (yes physical clubhouses without pay for play).

A friend's favorite adda was a fuckin commuter train. People would text each other to catch the same train and just chat for 40-50 mins of the journey.

Within Europe, spontaneously meeting someone on a casual stroll outside is more of a Southern European thing than a Northern European one. But Sweden (where I live now) has a strong "fika" culture instead, which is basically meeting up for coffee, taking it easy and catching up. So more or less the same thing, it's just a bit more planned and indoors.

I wouldn't be surprised if the difference has more to do with traditional weather conditions not being the kind where you go for a stroll outside

This phenomenon is found across other Indian cultures too, although it doesn't have a name as such. There's even a pretty good Hindi/Urdu podcast called Puliyabazi, whose name pays homage to this practice.

I grew up and studied in Kolkata, and have lived elsewhere in India, but I haven’t quite seen anything like the daily adda outside of West Bengal. The article is spot on with most of us not even realizing how special it is unless we move out.

> Adda is a beloved pastime that's unique to Kolkata

As others have pointed out. The idea of Adda isn't that uncommon. Even the specific word, Adda, is just as native to Bangladesh. The Bengali ethnicity extends beyond the Indian border. Wish the author had mentioned that.

Sounds wonderful! Would love if this were a thing elsewhere. I don't think I've experienced anything similar since I left uni, where unplanned, all-night conversations might happen randomly in halls' kitchens, pubs etc.

I wish "adda" existed here in the states. In some ways online forums are an online version of "adda" but in-person, thought-provoking conversations can't be replicated online. It makes me miss college life where you could pop into so many interesting discussions whether in the dorms or on-campus. Clubhouse tried to replicate this but the users can't really participate in a fluid conversation. I'm just wondering if there's anyway tech could enable these organic mind meetups?

I'm not seeing it as a unique thing. I have distinct memories of my grandparents, great grandparents, and their neighbors hanging out together on my great grandparents' screened porch and talking for hours into the evening after supper time. For people born in the early 1900s and earlier in the South, it's just what you did, because the wind moved better outdoors than indoors and the matriarch of the family just spent a couple hours warming the house up in the summer time with her cooking. The men would sit in rocking chairs with cigarettes or cigars and talk about sports, politics, how their crops were doing, etc, and the women would sit together on makeshift outdoor couches with dinner mints or desserts to discuss their kids and the local gossip.

Even today, my friends and their families will get together for game nights twice a week at different homes, just discussing whatever comes to mind while playing board or card games.

What is Adda? How is it different from people discussing about a topic? I don't understand from this article, but it sounds like something I'd like to know more about.

Argentinians do this a lot. We don't have a name for it other than "juntada" (lit. gathering). Maybe is the Italian cultural influence.

We just get together and chat, in parks, cafes, houses, wherever. We even incorporate strangers into these conversations. It's a great way to meet people.

I always assumed this was quite common in all/most cultures.

Reminds me very much of the salon: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salon_(gathering)

How is an adda different from a normal conversation that people have? I feel like the article did not explain this sufficiently.

Speaking as an Indian, what sets apart adds is that they can go on for hours together and they happen at regular frequency.

Say you are bored (I know it’s a rare thing now a days) then you know that if you go to the usual hangout place you will invariably find a few people, some of whom are your acquaintances/friends, gathered aimlessly conversing.

The group is very fluid, random people join and leave and when you are sort of done you too leave. There are no rules as such but people usually don't cross personal boundaries.

It is an essential part of being in a community. One is implicitly expected to take part in such addas from time to time. This is how small towns/villages operate. Or at least did, I don’t see it around me anymore.

So kind of a physical Clubhouse?

Perhaps similar to descriptions I read about the cafes of Paris, or SoHo in the artistic district, except here its not limited to a certain class.

Not clear on how this is distinct from simply having a fun conversation.

Adda doesn't need to be fun. Addas are usually unplanned. It often involves stumbling upon an acquaintance on the street and just catching up on the side of the road.

Imagine a spontaneous conversation with an acquaintance at a grocery store but at any random place, without any capitalistic purchases required during the interaction.

Isn't that a normal thing? Where isn't this done? If you bump into someone you know do you just greet them and then leave?

It's not the same. Usually American interactions are small talks. Adda is literally stopping in your pace, talking and hanging out for hours. HOURS. Completely unplanned.

The closest thing to adda in America is college dorm/fraternity/sorority life. Mindless chatter for hours after bumping into someone. Or maybe like a night at the bar. You're hanging out for HOURS.

In India, you don't need a social setting for that. That bear-like hanging out will literally happen on the streets. Perhaps one of the reasons why the country appears so crowded. People hang out outside far too much.

Are you from the US? This is clearly a distinct concept from my American perspective because it captures the cultural expectation of conversation and discussion.

America is a very isolated, lonely place. These fun, ephemeral conversations don’t happen much here.

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