If what you say is true, it should've been true for earlier human civilizations too.
Why didn't the Chinese and Japanese civilizations unite to conquer others?
Why didn't the Mongols unite with whoever else to conquer, instead of Genghis Khan doing it all with a bunch of Mongols in horses?
Human civilization is a dark forest that only changed with global trade. The communication challenge is language and culture. And civilizations have always been technologically distinct, with the more powerful one almost always conquering.
With interstellar communication and technological advance it would be orders of magnitude higher stakes.