I accidentally abandoned many of my preferences (likes/dislikes) and automated judgments. I took this newfound perspective into music, embodying the idea of "there are no wrong notes." I find deep joy in sitting at a 120+ year old pump organ, holding a mishmash of dissonant notes, including some out of tune ones, and wiggling one of the keys to learn to spot it in the mashup. It gives me a chance to witness the internalized feelings conditioned from classical musical training and listening to a ton of western music throughout my life, as well as to watch those feelings fade away into the joy.

We can learnjoy anything, which is why choosing to do anything without joy doesn't make sense to me anymore.