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Comment by tssva | Hacker News Reader

It sounds like you probably have a fairly healthy and loving relationship with your mother. Not all family relationships are that way whether at the fault of the parents, children or both. I recommend not projecting your family history on to others and judging them based upon it.

Some parents and some children don't deserve to be seen more than twice in 30 years. Some children should never suffer being exposed to their grandparents.

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That doesn’t make the story any less tragic. To have 10 kids and not want to see any of them is beyond sad.

Try to remember, a mother, including yours, is just a girl with her own dreams.

You realize there's a whole religious backdrop to this as well right? She seems like a faithful Catholic. If here children are as well, then they probably see nothing wrong with this. It's not about not wanting to see them, it's about wanting to live your calling more. It's like the Sound of Music, when Mother Superior tells Maria that loving Captain Von Trapp does not mean loving God less, but in reverse.

> To have 10 kids and not want to see any of them is beyond sad.

Monastic life is a sacrifice, in part because those who follow it do want to see their family etc. She felt that following Christ in a life of prayer separate from the world was what her heart most wanted, it was what God was calling her to do, and it was important for her salvation. You do not understand that but any faithful Catholic child would even though it is bittersweet for them too.

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