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Comment by smogcutter | Hacker News Reader

Any other wargamers here?

I got into 40k in middle school because the lore and toys were awesome, ditched it in high school as girls suddenly became more interesting than space marines (and seemed mutually exclusive), and in the past few years got back into historical wargaming. Spent most of quarantine painting opposing French and Austrian divisions for the war of 1809, among some other projects.

One thing I’ve really enjoyed about historical games , at least with the groups I’ve been playing with, is the focus on process over result. Winning is nice, but the narrative and choices that develop over the course of the game are really what everyone’s there for.

Edit: totally forgot to add! HN’s favorite Bret Devereux recently appeared on a 40k podcast, where he talked historical precedent for the imperium of man. Great listen! https://www.frontlinegaming.org/2021/02/15/chapter-tactics-1...

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> girls suddenly became more interesting than space marines (and seemed mutually exclusive)

I’m 45 - they still do. I’ve had geeky hobbies as an adult and knew one woman who was into miniatures, but over time I’ve come to value female friendships more than my mutually exclusive geeky hobbies. Somehow I seem to have gone from introverted to full on extrovert in the last 30+ years, I’m still not sure how it happened, but at this point in my life social connections are really at the heart of who I am, and solitary pursuits are much less consuming. No real point in making this comment other than self reflection, and perhaps curiosity as to how many others made such a transition. Maybe it is typical, I just did not see it until it had already happened. Video games became boring. Ah, I just don’t have enough time! Nope, turns out I’m just really not that interested any more. Fascinating.

I'm also 45. My transition from an introvert to an extrovert was a conscious effort when going from computer security to teaching. I never gave up on my geeky hobbies after marriage but haven't really had much time for them, especially after parenthood..

Mid 30s. I paint minis with my wife on the regular. Exactly zero of my friends who are women think my minis are weird. Almost everybody who comes over and sees the display cases says “wow how awesome”.

The hobby community is heavily male because of marketing and a community that was actively hostile to women (similar to many male dominated hobbies). But nothing about the actual activity should be gendered. Don’t let shitty culture control your decisions. Be the change!

One of my best friends is a die-hard female 40k player (late 30s) who plays Sisters and Necrons. Her armies are even painted. But you’re right, she’s said she’s usually the only woman at any of the gatherings she goes to and she has to deal with gross boys slobbering over her (she’s cute and dorky). But she’s also made friends with plenty of guys who respect that she’s in a relationship because in your 30s most adults are mature enough to have platonic opposite-sex relationships.

But I think what you’re talking about. I went through a similar transition, when hobbies went from a way to occupy time to a way to meet people. Once you hit 30, people’s lives diverge to such a degree you actually have to put yourself out in the world if you want to have friends. If you don’t have kids you have to seek out other child-free people (no knock on parents; it’s just not for me). I got back into video games over the pandemic because the situation called for occupying time in solitude, but totally leaving that all behind now that gatherings are a thing again.

Personally I think it’s a bit of a mid-life crisis: the term has a negative meaning in the west as a stereotype where someone will go out and buy a sports car and get a younger boyfriend/girlfriend, but for many people it’s just a bit of feeling your own mortality and carving out a life that makes you happy now that you’re old enough to understand what drives you.

A sports car... or a Forge World Titan...

I am quite lucky and I have a good narrative/fluff focused group I play with. We have been playing Crusade (new Campaign system in W40K 9th ed.) and when there are difficult tactical decisions to be made, we always try to make them in the spirit of the characters and armies we are building up. This makes it more fun than the WAAC games we face in tournaments.

Reporting in, sir!

I've played 40k since 1987 and WH Fantasy since 1990. I used to play fantasy tournaments along with the Orange County Choppas, usually with a high elf army. Played for the US national championship in 'Ard Boyz twice, but never won it. Back in 2014 I had to quit the tournament scene, as I was working on a startup and I just couldn't keep it all in my head.

The local WH Fantasy scene here in Central Florida kind of dried up after Age of Sigmar, so I haven't had a good game in ages.

I got into wargaming a few years when I decided a needed a non-tech hobby. I guess I'm ultimately more a miniature painter than a gamer(though I do game with my miniatures) and I've found the painting very therapeutic.

Not 40k but the warhammer armies project with some friends (most of them started playing fantasy back during the 6th and 7th edition).

For years I mostly painted without playing (it is a great source of calmness for me), but during the pandemic, my brother got himself a capable 3D printer and we started printing models (there is a huge amount of great and affordable ones out there) and I started building an army (beastmen) to play. We all are interested in fluff and storytelling, so that usually makes a long game go by quite quickly (and makes for great and very weird conversation pieces, even years later).

I also seem to have been lucky with the girls/women in my life, never seemed mutually exclusive (one of them actually taught me how to paint in a somewhat proper way).

I've played on and off for the past 25 years (high school).

I always wanted to play fantasy (Age of Sigmar now I guess), but it has never been that popular at the places I play.

I played a lot of 40k, but got rid of it all in a move one time. Still really love the lore.

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