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If a person doesn't believe that a trans woman is literally a woman, and discusses that with their family, is that something that a reasonable person would consider insulting?

I certainly wouldn't have said so five years ago, but given the madness sweeping across the land, now who knows?

Then you weren't paying attention.

The insult laws were already tried and the result was appearance of many insulted people which was enough to apply the law. Often they didn't know what was the insult.

Using a jury, or previous decisions by superior courts.