I've run into the same reactions from friends and colleagues. They're surprised that someone with a career in IT and tech doesn't want smart speakers or home assistants or any kind of IoT.
In their perception, I should be all over every new little gadget and interconnected doodad, but those sorts of devices just drive me up the wall. There is always some annoying issue or limitation, a lot of them don't even perform their primary function adequately, and if something goes wrong, you have no logging or diagnostics possibilities, short of maybe cracking open the case and looking for a JTAG connector or something.
It drives me crazy when I can't just look at a log file or at least get a descriptive error message, it's always just "oops, something broke, sorry about that teehee". Then you power cycle the device and hope that works, if not then you try a factory reset. If that doesn't work, what do you do? Everything is so integrated today that old-school fault finding on a PCB won't yield anything of value. I hate it.
I do have some smart/IoT/modern gadget tech devices. The thermostats on our radiators are intelligent. By this I mean they have a programmed daily schedule, to lower temps at night. They also sense open windows from the temperature drop and shut the heat off and then on again when we close the windows. The only connectivity on them is Bluetooth, which has to be turned on by a button press on the individual thermostat, every time you want to connect to it. That is the sort of connectivity I will accept from "smart" devices.
The other is a Chromecast, which is reluctantly tolerated because it's the lowest-friction way to have a collaborative queue of videos to watch, when you're in couch potato mode. But if anything goes wrong, you have to break out the garlic and black candles and hope you can perform the proper incantation to make it happy again. If I could get similar functionality on the HTPC in a web browser tuned to https://youtube.com, that little puck-like bastard would be forever banned from the premises.
If I want more home automation, I will program it myself using a Pi or Arduino or ESP32 or something, combined with commodity electronics and sensors. So far, the need has not presented itself.